My Brother's Keeper
by silverwolflover
Summary: My name is Azaria Crain and I was so close to not being called in the Hunger Games. My name wasn't called. But my little brother's was. Knowing that I wouldn't be able to stand the sight of seeing him fight for his life and not be able to do anything, without thinking, I volunteer to take the place of some girl from my district so that I may stand with my brother as a Tribute.
1. The Reaping

Chapter 1 Reaping

My name is Azaria and as of now I stand with a crowd of young women from District 7, waiting for the reaping to be over and, like everyone else, hoping that I would not be picked. There is always a small chance that an individual could be picked, but you never know when that small chance will happen. I've turned seventeen and will be eighteen soon, and once this reaping is over I won't have to worry about it any more, right? Wrong. My younger brother, Jaran, turned twelve this year. It is obviously his first time to be in the reaping and has every right to be just as scared as anyone else that turned twelve this year. I worry about him contantly because he is not as strong as he probably should be. He's thin from not eating much, dark brown eyes and hair parted to the side, and is mostly timid around new people. He can be resouceful and has kept us alive on some occasions when I couldn't get us something to eat. Both our parents died in an accident while cutting down trees and ever since then me and my brother have been living on our own at the edge of town.

As we stand through the repeated video from the Capitol I look over to the crowd of boys to see if I could pinpoint where my brother is. Like I had hoped he is standing at the very edge where I can easily see him. At the same moment he turns to to look for me and finds me almost instantly. Our eyes locked and I can see how frightened he is, but he hides it well. I give him a nod, telling him to stay strong. I dare not raise his hopes in telling him that things will be all right, that he can't be picked out of many boys just because his name is in for the first time. As the video finally comes to an end we all turn our attention back to the speaker, a rather outrageous looking man reminds me of a clownish dog. He wore a gold jacket that had fur on the cuffs of his sleeve and on the hemming jacket while dog-like ears stuck out from the hood. His face was white and he has something around his eyes to make them seem bigger than usual. He kind of acted giddy and jumpy and curled his fingers constantly as if they were paws.

Once the video was over the clown dog person started talking excitedly about things that I didn't bother to try and listen to. When he was done ranting about whatever that was when he said that he would get started with the drawing.

"As usual, one lovely young lady shall be picked first." Said the clown dog as he literally skipped to the girl's jar. Reaching a hand inside he swirled his hands around, making a loud ruckus that only managed to disturb everyone. Finally his hand stopped and whipped out a neatly folded piece of paper. He looked at his crowd excitedly, sticking out the tip of his tongue in an attempt to look comical only making him look ridiculous. Skipping back over to the mic he tapped it a few times with his finger and placed his face close so that he could be heard. He opened the paper.

As I watched him I kept my face emotionless with the only expression of fear that you could see was through my brown eyes. The only reason why I hope not to be chosen is because I'm the only one who can take care of my brother, and now that, if I'm not picked, I won't be in reapings anymore I will have to worry about my brother being picked. Squeezing my hands into a tight fist I stare at the blank back of the piece of paper in the clown dog's hands, willing him to say a different name yet expecting to hear my own.

"The female Tribute for District 7 of this year's Hunger Games is... Ariana Carlton." The name sounding so close to mind nearly made my heart stop and then had me gasping in relief. Of course I felt bad for the fifteen year old girl, but I was still thankful that I was spared this year. Sadly the girls parted, making an isle for the girl to walk through. A few of us reached out a hand to pat her on the shoulder, giving her their sympathies even though they knew it won't make her feel any better. As she slowly walked on, obvioiusly dreading the moment, I too reached my hand out to her. You could also hear a lone woman weeping mournfully as she said in a begging chant to not take her only daughter. Once she was up on the stage the clown dog man gave a little applause, shaking her hand and congratulating her and saying things like 'you must feel honored to be representing your District' and all that stuff. The poor girl, you could even see her eyes tearing up.

"Next are the boys. Are you ready gentlemen?" Like he did with the girl's jar the clown dog man swirled his hand in circles and eventually popped his hand out with a piece of paper. Once again my hands became fists as I unknowingly held my breath, this time praying that the name would not be my brother's name. One part of me kept telling myself that his name is only one out of many and it can't be him, while the other part kept saying that it could be him and if it is I can't do anything about it. As the clown dog skipped over to the mic he assumed the same position to read the name

"The male Tribute for District 7 of this year's Hunger Games is..." The ponding in my ears was so loud that I almost missed the name being called, but I knew that no matter what, even if people were screaming all around me, I would never had missed the name Jaran Crain being called out. My head whipped around as my eyes immediately landed on my brother's face, his mouth open in shock but his eyes showed deeper terror. Like they did with Ariana the boys made way for him. Jaran looked down at the ground, back up at the stage, and then without looking for me he took one hesitant step forward, and then another, and another. As he walked I followed his movements with my eyes and with my feet. Once he was out of the crowd of boys he was surrounded by an escort of Peacekeepers.

Even though there was no motherly wail or the shouted cry of a father to tell the child that there was someone that cared for them there was my desparate shout of volunteer as I broke through the crowd of girls. I knew that I couldn't take Jaran's place because the Games only required a male and a female, and no young man in his right mind would switche places for my brother's sake without having his own risk and fears, but I refused to allow my brother to participate in the Hunger Games. Not without me. I know that ever since I turned twelve I have always hoped that I would never be picked and always hoped that I could make it to my last reaping and wouldn't have to worry about being called. Now that day has come and was very quickly ripped away from me in the form of my little brother's name being called.

With everyone's attention focused on me I stood straight, keeping my head held high as I glared at the ridiculous looking man while I tried to not let my voice break. "I volunteer to be District 7's female Tribute. I will take Ariana's place in the Hunger Games." I said, glad that my voice made me sound as strong as I wished I was. I quickly stole a glance at my brother who looked back at me with large tears threatening to run down his thin face as he shook his head at me. I gave him a warm smile and then turned my attention back to the stuttering clown dog man.

"A-are you sure? Why didn't you volunteer earlier?" He shifted when he didn't get an answer from me. "Very well then, off you go." The clown dog man flicked both his hand at Ariana in a shooing motion. Ariana didn't need to be told twice as she rushed off the stage. Instead of heading straight towards her mother that was waiting where the parents were she came up to me and gave me a hug, whispering thank you's to me and then ran off. The Peacekeepers then escorted me and my brother up on to the stage. "So what is your name my brave girl?" The man said, putting the mic in front of me so that everyone could hear.

"My name is Azaria. Azaria Crain." I said, not really looking at the crowd of people in front of me. The clown dog man at least looked surprised as he glanced between me and my brother.

"So you two are brother and sister, how nice. Eager to kill him off yourself I bet." With that he moved me towards my brother so that we could stand side by side as he addressed the cheerless crowd before him. Jaran looked up at me questioningly obviously wondering why I would bother to take the place of someone else. I held his hand and smiled sadly at him. Even though he didn't want me with him I could see the relief in his eyes that I was there.

"At least none of us will be alone." I say. And for once, I lied to my brother. Because I knew only one of us was going back home and it was going to be him.

First chapter down, several more to go. Hope you enjoyed it and review and tell me what you think :3


	2. The Capitol

Chapter 2

After our reaping me and Jaran were separated and were about to be taken to different rooms when the clown dog stopped the Peacekeepers.

"Now now, I don't think that would be necessary. They are siblings after all. Let them stay in the waiting rooms together." He said. He patted both of our heads and frisked down the hall. As we were taken to the waiting rooms I couldn't help but stare at the weird man. It was also then that I noticed that he had a tail.

'Oh for the love of... do all these Capitol people look and act just as weird as him?' I think as I rolled my eyes at his retreating figure.

As we waited in the waiting room Jaran and I were somewhat surprised when Ariana and her parents came in to see us. Like earlier Ariana came up to me and gave me an even longer hug while her mother craddled Jaran in her arms. I watched as tears started to roll down his face as he buried his face in Mrs. Carlton's clothes. Having been without our mother for so long he must have missed the feel of a mother's loving embrace to a child.

"Azaria, I wanted to tell you how thankful I am to you for sparing my daughter. I know you only did it so that you could be with your brother Jaran and to protect him, but nonetheless, I am still grateful." The mother said. For a second I was actually kind of surprised that she even knew my name, but then I remembered I said my name out loud for everyone to hear. She must have seen it on my face. "I knew your parents before. We just never met. Our family would sometimes leave food for you when we could spare it."

Now that I think about it I did remember some days, coming back home after doing some errands, to see a small wrapped up parcel in front of our small home. Now I know who it was. "Thank you for taking care of me and my brother. I guess this is just a coincidental way of repaying you for that." I say, breaking away from Ariana and hugging her mother.

"We wished that we could've done a better job, but it was difficult." Said Mr. Carlton. I shook my head as I hugged Jaran to me.

"No. You had done more than enough compared to everyone else in our district. At least you cared for us." I say. just then the Peacekeepers opened the door to lead the family out. Before they could take Ariana she dodged away from their hands.

"Here, I want you to have this for good luck." She said forcing something into my hand and then was taken away. When the door closed Jaran had recovered enough to wipe away his tears and lean over to me as we sat down on a couch.

"What is it, Zari?" He asked, calling me by his favorite pet name for me. Unfisting my hands over the object we see that the Carltons had given us a necklace with the pendant of a small angel or person, because it didn't have a halo or an angelic robe, with large wings wrapped protectively around it so that you could only see the head of a woman. "Zari, do you think they gave this to you because of your name? Um, what does it mean again?"

"Mother told me it meant 'helped by god'" I told him, not really believing in any of that stuff. But that's what mother named me and apparently she liked it. Though I definitely didn't feel helped at all.

Just then we heard the door opening again and Jaran and I jumped to our feet. We weren't expecting anyone else to come see us so we were curious as to who it was this time. 'This day is just full of surprises.' I thought sarcastically as we saw who came in the room. It was a guy that I remembered seeing in school a few times, along with some other people that I could probably point out from memory. Since all I cared about was taking care of me and my brother I didn't even think of trying to make friends. I guess I would've liked some but that wasn't really on my mind. From what I remember I think he should be on his last year of reaping or something. All I know was that he is just another student older than me.

"Hi. I guess you're both wondering why I'm here and you don't even know me. I'm Gabriel Oscar." The young man said, reaching out a hand to both of us. Because Jaran hasn't really seen him before he immediately presses himself against me as he stares at Gabriel's hand. Wrapping an arm around him I extend my own hand and shake Gabriel's.

"Not to sound... rude, but why are you here?" I asked as I brought my hand back to my side. It probably was rude to say anyway but I didn't care.

"I guess I just wanted to say that I agree with our District escort. He was right about you being brave and all, taking the place of someone that isn't your family just so that you can be with your brother. Jaran, was it?" Gabriel leaned down so that he was eye level with Jaran. Still up against my side Jaran nodded his head. Smiling, as if satisfied that Jaran at least responded with a head nod, he straightened up and looked back at me. "I don't think anyone would probably be able to do that. And as I watched you volunteer yourself I thought about how cowardly I was when my younger brother was picked for the Hunger Games a few years ago and I didn't even go in his place." Now that he said it I actually remembered that time, but only because he brought it up.

I was kind of speechless by the praise so I just nodded my head awkwardly. I never was good with taking compliments. "It's understandable." I say. "There's nothing cowardly about it." I don't doubt that he loved his brother as much as I love Jaran, it's just that... I couldn't loose Jaran. He's the only one I got.

Suddenly the door opened again, signaling that time was up. Before Gabriel could be pulled away Jaran rushed forward, taking one of his hands, and shook it. "Thank you." He said and then Gabriel was gone. Jaran stared at the closed door for a few seconds and then turned to look at me. "That was nice of him." He said.

After a few hours later we were picked up by the clown dog man, telling us it was time to go. Obediently me and Jaran followed him to where the Tribute train waited to take us to the Capitol. The whole time as we walked there the clown dog man was babbling about how gorgeous the inside of the train was, how magnificent the Capitol is, and how we would love all the new fashion trends that just came out. At that last statement I looked down at Jaran, and him at me, with an amused smile with one eyebrow arched up as if saying 'imagine wearing his outfit.' We both laughed as the idea came to mind.

"Come come now, you silly giggle-heads. It's time to go." Said the clown dog man in a singsong voice, one booted gold foot already on the train. Once we were inside the train I immediately looked out the window just as the train was pulling out. Just before we lost sight of District 7 from the rush of speed I was just able see our small and lonely house at the edge of town resting under the shade of a large pine tree. As I stared out the window, even after I couldn't see anything esle but the landscape, I never realized just how much I loved that house. It was full of so many memories. Sad, happy, old and new.

"Zari Zari, look at this!" Jaran's excited voice pulled me from my thoughts. "Can we really eat all this?" I couldn't think of the past, now I must concentrate on keeping Jaran safe. While walking over to see what got Jaran so worked up I notice that there's a kind of buffet spread. My eyes widen at the sight of so much food, wondering if it is even possible for only a few people to eat so much.

The clown dog man was obviously delighted with Jaran's enthusiasm as he gladly pointed at each dish and named them for him. "Azaria, isn't this great? We won't be hungry anymore." Jaran said. "Come on, sister. Let's eat." Jaran ran around the table and pulled me to sit next to him.

"Oh how wonderful. May I join you two?" The clown dog asked, actually putting his wrists up and his hands bent as if begging like a dog. Jaran nodded and patted the chair next to him. I had to admit, despite his outrageous appearance and his freakishly puppydog-like behavior, he's actually not all that bad. And it seems that Jaran has taken a liking to him, so I don't mind. Much.

While we ate the thought came to me that sooner or later I was going to have to address the man by his real name instead of referring to him as the clown dog man. I'm not really sorry about not paying attention to him when he introduced himself at the reaping though. "Excuse me, but what is your real name again? I didn't catch it at the rea-" I didn't even get to finish my sentence because, I guess one more time couldn't hurt, the clown dog man fell out of his chair in such a dramatic display I thought he was stung by a bee.

"Oh my heavens. Did I not introduce myself at the Reaping? Oh, I am such a terrible escort. Please forgive me." He then stood up straight, this time looking more like a gentleman. In posture, not appearance. "My name is Tobias Cadogan, at your service." With that he did a very fancy bow and sat back down. I too also turned back to my food, trying not to laugh out loud. Honestly, could this man get any weirder. I swear I remember someone from school having a little puppy called Tobias. With my head still bowed over my plate full of food I glance over at Tobias who was talking with Jaran. I also didn't fail to hear the word 'dog' in his last name. "Is there something wrong, miss Zari? Do I have somthing on me?" Tobias pulled at his jacked as he looked around at himself. I had to lean my chin on my hand to prevent myself from staring at him with my mouth open when I saw that his tail could even move. What's next, his ears can swivel?

"It's nothing. And plese, call my Azaria." I said, wanting Jaran to be the only one to call me that. Visibly relaxing Tobias returned to eating his meal. The food was really good, of course compared to what we get in our District, and I got really full easily. I had only gone through more than half of my plate of food and couldn't really finish anymore. 'I probably ate too fast.' I think. Wiping my mouth with a napkin I walk over to the cushioned seats and marveled at how soft they were. Once Jaran and Tobias were done they followed me to the couch. Tobias sat on the one opposite of me while Jaran plopped down next to me with a sigh and hugged my arm.

"That was the best food I've ever eaten." Jaran says.

"And the best part is that was just a snack. Dinner will be ready shortly." Tobias said as if he really was hungry for dinner and didn't just eat a full meal.

"Really?" Jaran said with just as much surprise as me. He then sits up a bit, not letting go of my arm, and looks around. "So who is going to be our mentor for the games?" He says all of a sudden.

"Jaran." I say in warning. I didn't want him thinking of that kind of stuff. Not now, not yet. He flinches somewhat and smiled at me apologetically. He obviously already knew I wouldn't want to discuss things like that yet but he just couldn't help asking. Speaking of which our mentor just walked in from the other train car. It's pretty obvious by now that I barely pay any attention to things concerning the Capitor or their stubid games. So as I look at our mentor the only memory that comes to mind of him was one out of many faces that I've seen chosen for the reaping. He wasn't that old, only having gone through the games several years ago. He had short messy bed hair and a small beard just starting to grow at the tip of his chin.

Yawning and stretching his arms in the air he sits down on a single couch next to me and Jaran's and relaxed his feet on the low table. "So these are the new Tributes." He says, looking at me and Jaran. Though his face seemed relaxed and sleepy, under his half-lidded eyes, he sized us up with a piercing gaze that searched for what is needed. Because of how he his acting right now he vaguely reminds me of a wolf. Seemingly harmless while yawning as they lay out, but anything can get them instantly to their feet with bared fangs and ready to fight.

Because nothing is being said at the moment Jaran starts to become timid again as he scoots closer to me but his face remains neutral as he stares back at our mentor. "Are you done with your inspection?" I ask, also becoming a little uneasy with the man's unrelenting gaze. Still without saying anything the man kind of gives us a smirk and gets up to get a plate of food. Before I could say anything, or ask anything the man was already giving us insructions.

"I trust that you both are nice and full, correct?" He asked, getting this and that from the buffet spread with a fork and putting them on his plate. He took our silence as confirmation. "You can go to your rooms if you wish. They're in the next car from where I just came from. Since you two are siblings you can sleep together in the room to the right or opposite from each other if you wish to be separated. Either way they are already full with things you might need. Rest, get cleaned up, everything here is all for you to do as you will. Take advantage of it all while you can. It's only your first day so there is nothing to discuss for now. Later on dog boy will retrieve you for dinner and to watch the reaping videos of all the districts. And we will be arriving in the Capitol by tomorrow noon so get some sleep while you're at it." He turned back around to us with a full plate, already chewing on something, and he made his way back to where he was sitting. "Any questions cause I think I've probably answered most of them for you." He said.

"May I ask what is your name again then?" I ask. "I don't follow along with the games."

The man chuckles. "I'm not surprised since it is just you two. I'm Vincent Randi. I've seen you before around town, doing whatever you can to support you and your brother. It's not just you. I watch everyone, but I actually notice things." He said giving me a look that said 'unlike you.' I didn't care. I was happy enough the way we lived. Probably wished it could've been better, but that's just how it was.

For the rest of the ride until it was time to go to bed me and Jaran stayed out with Vincent and Tobias instead of checking out our rooms. It's not like it's going anywhere. Though I did excuse myself so that I could clean myself up in the shower, and the whole time I was in it I was wondering how in the world could they have so much water on just a train. When I got back the three guys were already watching the reaping videos. Jaran pulled me over so that I could sit next to him on the floor. Once again my habit of ignoring the tv when it went on started as I lay on my side and stared at nothing in particular.

"Azaria, I suggest you watch and see who you are going up against if you want to survive this." Vincent said, nodding towards the tv. He didn't say anything after that and I knew that he left it up to me to decide what I wanted to do. He was right about that though. If I am to protect my brother better when we get into the arena I should at least see who are the other Tributes. Rolling onto my stomach I finally looked up at the tv and engraved the faces of the Tributes to memory. As I watched I made mental notes on who to watch more closely, especially the careers. I could see how eager they were to be a part of the Games as they volunteered, their arrogant confidence in their abilities made me feel even more disgusted with them. "Cheaters." I mumbled so that Jaran could only hear, both of us laughing quietly to ourselves.

Once I separated the faces of the Careers I then identified the other Tributes from the other districts. I observed each and everyone's body movement, their build, their expressions. Especially their eyes. How they reacted when called. Once I had gotten a good look at them I would then place them in individual categories in my head along with possible talents that they could have from their district. Like the strong but slow looking boy from 1, possible smart girl from 3, the boy with hidden talents from 5, the young girl from 9 who can probably avoid others. It's a mouthful but it helps me to know them more better.

When the clips are all over everyone breaks for bed. Vincent quietly gets up and tells us to get some rest while Tobias pretty much curled up on the couch to sleep. I was actually so caught up in studying the other Tributes that I didn't notice that Jaran was already using me as a pillow, his head resting on my back as he slept on his side. I could see he was trying to keep awake during the recap videos but he still fell asleep. Moving slowly so that I don't wake him I pick him up, noticing that he was already gaining some weight in his thin body, and carried him to bed. As I tuck him in I review in my head all the Tributes, the feeling of actually thinking about them was quite odd to me, but it was necessary. Changing into what I believe are sleepwear I slip under the covers and hold my brother to me, promising him and myself that I will keep him safe.

The next morning, late morning, I woke up to the sound of rhythmic knocking and Tobias' singsong voice telling her to get up already.

"It's almost noon miss Zar- I mean Azaria. We're already close to the Capitol. Hurry and change." Tobias said through the door and then left. At first I was grumbling about what he was talking about and then what he said finally found its way into my mind. Barely noting that Jaran wasn't with me I go to the window and see Panem. It was as big and grand just as Tobias had said.

"I can't believe it." I say to myself. "We're actually here. At the Capitol." I watch as the already big buildings become larger the closer we get to it, its illustrious designs failing to mask the terrible things that the Capitol has done.


	3. Tributes

Chapter 3

For me the past few hours have just been tiring. I know I didn't do much other than walk through flashing cameras and having my body go through a huge and painful makeover, but it was still tiring. Just before we had gotten off of the train and met our stylists Vincent was telling us what was going to be happening until we meet again later today. At first I felt a little panicked about being separated from the one familiar person who truly knows how to help us, but I forced myself to be calm. Because we didn't have much time to talk, mostly from me waking up too late, Vincent made everything as short and simple as he could before we pulled into the station.

"Once you and Jaran get off the train you will be taken to be thoroughly cleaned and to meet your stylists. Whatever they do just don't whine or protest and go along with it. Who knows, you might even like them." Vincent turned his attention to Jaran who I can see was very nervous seeing so many people. I had reached out to him with one arm but Vincent pushed it away and didn't look at me when I glared at him. "Jaran, you will not be with your sister for several hours and will be surrounded by many people you do not know. I know you're scared even though you don't look it but you also need to do as I say." He spoke with a soft but firm voice which seemed to calm Jaran down a little but I could still see him shaking a bit. Just as we were getting off the train I turned to Vincent and asked him if he could hold on to my necklace that the Carltons had given me, knowing I would probably be told to remove it. He agreed and put it in his jacket pocket.

As I sat and waited in the room where I would meet my stylist I looked around absentmindedly as I wondered about how my brother was doing. Was he still scared? Was he getting along well enough with his prep team? Is he okay with his stylist if he already met him or her? So many questions were going around my head that for a moment I forced myself to stop thinking about him for a bit. Clearing my mind I told myself that he's strong and will be just fine and that I will be seeing his smiling face again soon.

Soon enough my stylist comes walking in and I stand up to meet her. From what I can see she must be a little bit shorter than me because her heels are just high enough so that our eyes are level, which, by the way, hers are unnaturally pink. Either that or her rose-shaped glasses make your eyes seem to be a different color. Her deep red dress reaches down in a mermaid style to just where you could barely see her toes and the sleeves, fading from red to yellow towards the ends, stop at her elbows but continues to trail down until it nearly meets the floor. Her long and silver hair tipped with light blue reaches down slightly past her waist with loose curls and is pulled forward to frame her heart shaped face. Compared to some others I've seen I actually find her style a little bit more tolerable, though the thing that caught me more off guard than the eyes was the fact that there is a pink mouse sitting atop her head.

"Greetings, Azaria. My name is Aylin and I am your stylist." Aylin said, holding out a hand to me. I politely give her hand a shake and let go as she starts to circle me. As she looks me over I couldn't help but stare at her pink eyes and then shifting to look at the mouse on her head. She must have caught me staring at her mouse cause she reaches up, takes the mouse in her hands, and hold it out to me. "His name is Rune. Would you like to pet him?" She asked. She neither sounded cross or pleasant, just neutral.

I was slightly hesitant with my response, wondering what was going through this woman's head, but I gently picked up the mouse and stared at it. I don't know why but I couldn't help a little smile at how cute it was, despite the odd coloring. "He's cute." I say, handing him back to her. When I say that her face then splits into a huge pink-lipped smile that makes me think of a happy little girl.

"Alrighty then." She said with a perky voice and snaps her fingers. "Let's see how you look in your costume for the opening ceremony." She turns to look behind her as we watch a pair of avoxes roll in a table laid out with the costume that I was going to wear. I don't get to have a good look at it however when Aylin pulls me elsewhere to get my measurements. From what I saw I guess it didn't seem that bad. I guess.

After a few hours of Aylin making some adjustments to my costume I was finally able to get dressed in them. For some reason she didn't allow me to look at myself in the mirror much less even look down at what I'm wearing. As she applied some makeup on me and then later on moving to my hair I could hear her occasional excited comments of how georgous I looked or how wonderful the dress was on me. Once I was done she snapped at the Avoxes again and they brought in a trifold mirror. With a pleasant smile Aylin gestured for me to step forward and see what I look like.

At first I had to stand there and try to find myself with all this... stuff on me. On my face she had put pine green eyeshadow that arced up from my lashes, making them look long. On my head was a tiara that was artistically made out of the seed scales of a large pine cone. It is connected with drooping strings of moss that goes around my head and under my black hair that is pulled back tight into a loose bun with two pine needle twigs sticking out from one side. I wore a tube dress that had the texture design of a tree trunk that hugged my form snuggly and flared out from my knees into roots that swished at the floor when I walked. Over the dress I had on a pine needle pancho that stopped just below my elbows at the front and ended right behind my knees at the back. They were actually real pine needles sewn in a soft material and made to look like the tree with its jagged look, it even had a few pine cones on it. On my forearms was a climbing vine armlet that wrapped around my wrist three times with a flower over it and then wound it's way up unitl the tip is nearly hidden from the pine needle pancho.

"What do you think. I decided to make things a little bit different for my Tributes this year. A little royal theme to go with your tree costumes." Aylin said as she sprinkled some sparkly green confetti stuff over my head. "Now you're ready. Time for the opening ceremonies." She says as she hustles me out of the room. On our way to the elevator that would take us to the bottom I see Jaran with his stylists and is all dressed up similarly to me but for a guy.

Like me he wore an overall tree trunk designed clothing but it's a unitard instead with pine needle shoulder guards and cape that reached down to his knee high boots that were a darker shade of brown and looked like roots. On his head he had a circlet of pine twigs with four berries in the middle over his forehead in the shape of a diamond and his hair was combed slightly forward with those green sparkly stuff. He didn't have as much makeup like I do but he has a light layer of pine green lining his eye. On his front he had a kind of chest armor made of pine twigs that ended at the middle of his stomach, over his wrists he had pine twig armlets, and at his waist was a belt of small pine cones.

Once he caught sight of me he actually smiled, seemingly relaxed. Sighing with relief I pulled him over to me as we all cramed into the elevator. "You feel like those pine trees that we used to climb?" I ask him, just finding our costumes amusing.

"Yeah. The pine needles are kind of itchy. But you look pretty Zari. Even though you look like a tree." Jaran laughed as he hugged my waist.

"I know, doesn't she." Aylin said, doting on both of us. "I just love how their brown eyes look with the green, it's superb. Don't you think Mikeg?" She said to the man next to her. It was Jaran's stylist but I didn't get a chance to see what he looks like cause the two were already pushing us out of the elevator and onto a chariot that is pulled by four chocolate colored horses. Apparently we were cutting it close because once our stylitst were done fixing us up, making sure everything was in place and giving us last instructions to enjoy ourselves, our chariot then started to roll forward and into the streets filled with the cheering crowd as we made our way to the City Circle.

Hearing the cheering voices of the crowd Jaran grew excited and enthusiastically waved at them. I guess his excited appearance was what got us some attention, a little tree princeling nearly jumping in his chariot as he waved as big as he could. While looking over the crowds as I waved back I could see several people pointing at Jaran and making gestures that make me think that they're calling him adorable. And I couldn't agree more. Feeling a little more relaxed with my brother with me I put my arm around him and at least put a little more effort in my wave, it was kind of hard to put my hand above my head because of the stiff bristles of my pine needle poncho. I heard a few aw's from the crowd when I hugged Jaran to me and hoped that having them see me care for my brother will get him sponsors.

As we moved past the crowds then directed their attention to the next on coming Tributes as we started to pass another section of cheering people. With the combination of the loud opening music and the roars of the crowd I'm kind of surprised that I have not gone deaf yet. I've always been used to the peaceful quiet of the forests behind our home so this is kind of like blowing trumpets in my face. After some time we finally made it to the City Circle, the horses automatically going to their designated position for District 7. Once all the Tributes were present and the music had ended the president addressed the people and gave the Tributes the official welcome. When that was done, the music resuming, the horses then pulled all the Tributes around the circle again and to the Training Center.

Tired from his sudden burst of energy Jaran had gone quiet and was leaning on me as I held him tight so he wouldn't fall off the chariot. When all the Tributes were inside and the doors had closed we were then met with our stylists and prep team, then later were joined by Vincent and Tobias, who was being almost just as giddy as our stylists and prep team. As we made our way up to District 7's floor in the Training Center Tobias was telling us how lovable we were together as royal tree siblings and that the whole time he has been almost everywhere shouting out to anyone who would care to listen just how adorable our relationship was.

"Ever since the train ride with you two yesterday I have got to say that you are the best Tributes I've ever been with." Tobias said, seeming to tear up as his tail wagged from side to side. It still disturbed me no matter how likable his personality can be. "Once we got off the train I was so excited for you both I couldn't stop talking about you." He then took a dramatic pose, pointing out towards the window and over the city and taking up some space in the middle. "Azaria the Guardian Protector, the brave sister!" He whirled around and gestured to Jaran. "Jaran the Youthful Delight, the brother who loves all! Such a wonderful sight they are together, what a loving pair. The bond of brother and sister could never be as strong as these two..." At this point it was pretty obvious that no one was really listening to Tobias as he kept on ranting, acting as if he was on stage reciting and epic story of heroes.

Despite being tired Jaran couldn't help laughing at Tobias' poetic remarks, Vincent not really trying hard to get him to stop with his ears plugged, and the stylists looking somewhat uncomfortable. The whole scene was just too amusing I couldn't help but laugh with Jaran. When we reached the seventh floor we all filed out of the elevator, first our stylists, me and Jaran, and Vincent, who had to pull Tobias by his sleeve or else he would never had noticed we were all gone.

"Well, I guess it should be a good thing that Tobias is so.. talkative." Vincent said, finally letting Tobias go when we were all in the main room. "At least everything that he says about you is all for your benefit. And Azaria, here's your necklace." Vincent reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out the angel necklace that I had asked him to hold for me.

"Thank you, Vincent." I say and take it back. I don't really know why I'm keeping it, since I probably won't be allowed to wear it in the games. 'I could probably sneak it.' I thought as I put it around my neck.

"You're welcome. You and Jaran should go get cleaned up. Like on the train you have your own rooms if you wish. When you're done dinner will be ready and we'll watch the opening ceremony replay. Tomorrow your training will begin." Vincent said and walked off to his own room while everyone else did the same. This time I went to my own room so that I could shower. At first I was confused on what I to do with so many buttons for the shower, but eventually I got the temperature to how I wanted and scrubbed hard at the make up on my face along with other stuff that my stylists had put on my skin.

Once I was done I got changed into a loose blouse and dress pants and walked out of my room for dinnner. Jaran was already eating at the table, his hair wet and messy. When he saw me he waved me over as he tried to say something but his mouth was full. When I sat down in the chair next to Jaran I put my fingers under his chin and closed his mouth before he could talk again. "Chew before you talk or else you'll bite your tongue." I teased and ruffled his hair.

The whole time during dinner and while we watched the replay Tobias would somehow keep a conversation going. Whether it was with himself when nobody bothered to listen or when Jaran and me would occasionally join in. Vincent and our stylists would also ask us some questions here and there, trivial questions that I didn't mind letting Jaran answer to most unless they were directed to me. In a way we all were not really watching the replay video. The only time we actually paid attention to what was going on was when the screen was showing me and Jaran's entrance while the commentators were talking about how this was probably the first time they've gotten a pair of siblings as Tributes and how close we looked together, even voicing out some concernt about us possibly having to fight each other to the death. Soon enough the video was finished and it was time for bed.

Already yawning I get off the couch and head to my room with Jaran following close behind. "Make sure you get a good night's rest. You're going to need it." Vincent calls out after us while he and the other adults stay seated on the couch. "Tomorrow morning I'll be instructing you in what you should do."

"Good night you two." Tobias said as he kneeled on the couch cushions and waved one of his arms excessively. "May you have wonderful dreams." Me and Jaran wave back at our weird district escort and bid everyone else goodnight.

"Jaran, do you want to sleep with me or would you like to sleep by yourself?" I ask him once we reach our rooms, which are right next to each other this time instead of across from each other.

"It's okay, Zari. I'll be okay. Goodnight." He said and hugged my waist.

"Goodnight, Jaran." I say as I hug him back. I kiss him on the top of his head and we both separate for our own rooms.

As I lay in bed, sleep already close, I wonder about tomorrow. Tomorrow is our first training session where they will teach us how to fight and other things that we will probably need to learn to survive in the arena. Running through my mind I started to give myself a quick assessment of what I can do and what I should probably work on. I'm pretty good with ropes, tying knots for securing things or making traps. When I was young, when Jaran was still very little, our father taught me a few tricks with an axe, but I haven't practiced in some time though I'm sure I could use those in the arena. Me and Jaran are excellent at climbing trees, even when it starts getting unstable at the top we somehow manage to still get up there. I'm not very good a foraging, but Jaran is. He could focus on some of the more smaller things while I learn how to defend both of us.

I try not to worry about too much as I list off the things that Jaran and I could do but when I start wondering about what would happen if we were put into an arena where none of our skills could help us I decide that it's time for me to go to sleep. Pulling the soft blankets closer around me, by force of habit, I curl up under the blanket and fall asleep. The last thing being on my mind is my brother as I unconsciously grip at my angel necklace.


	4. Training

Chapter 4

The next morning I wake up just before sunrise. I don't get up immediately and just lay in bed as I look out the window and watch the sun's rays streak soft colors cross the sky. Of course the beauty of it all is marred by the presence of the Capitol instead of watching the sun peak from behind the bristles of the pine trees at home. Deciding to do just that I pick up the remote and switch the picture on the window so that it does look like the sun is rising over the tree tops. But it's not the same. After wasting about half an hour in bed I finally get up and get dressed.

At the foot of the bed was a set of carefully laid out clothes for me. There were stretchy black pants that fit tight enough that flared slightly at the bottom, but not enough to interfere with any lower body activities, and a greenish blue shirt with half sleeves that were loosely ruffled at the end. Even though these were supposed to be my training clothes they still managed to look somewhat stylish. Apparently Aylin loves flared ending clothes.

As I step out of my room to head down for breakfast, tying up my long black hair, I see Jaran just getting out of his own room too. "Hey Jaran, I'll race you to the breakfast table." I say, already running down the hall. It took him a moment but just as I was about to pass him he then breaks into a run. Because I got a head start I hold myself back for a moment so that Jaran could get up to speed before we really race. "You can't beat me, little brother, and you never will." I tease as I put on extra speed and left him behind me. Because the table dining room really wasn't that far I had to really brake hard so I didn't smash into the breakfast table and then turn around and stop Jaran myself.

"Geez, you're always too fast, Zari." Jaran said in mock anger, pulling away and as we laughed at the poor Avox's worried face when he saw us coming fast towards the breakfast table. I know were aren't supposed to talk to them so I just looked at the male avox apologetically and he just nodded in turn. "Azaria look, they even have some of the berries that we like to pick in the forest." Jaran said, his plate already half full as he scooped up some berries. Finally, something familiar. Everything about the Capitol may be nice and luxurious but I still liked the simpleness from living in a District in the middle of a forest.

Not long after me and Jaran had filled our plates the others started coming in. Tobias was the first one to greet us as he strode in rather sleepily that I kind of had to do a double take. Okay, fine. He wasn't sleepy at all but actually looked somewhat normalish with a small smile on his face. I was already used to him being all springy and hyper so seeing look kind of mellow was a bit of a surprise. "Good morning miss Azaria, Jaran." he said as he walked, not skip, prance or flit, to the breakfast table. He may not have his fur lined jacket with the dog ears on but he still had his tail and had on a tight long sleeved golden shirt that reflected light with paw prints all over.

"Let's just say we kept him up past his bedtime." Vincent said as he walked in from behind Tobias. If anyone looked sleepy it was Vincent with his brown messy hair. Right now I'm wondering if he always looked like he just woke up.

"Good morning to all." Aylin says as she came strutting in with her partner. Today she is wearing another dress that looked like the one that she wore yesterday, except she was not wearing high heels today and looked smaller. Also instead of red and pink, today she chose to wear green, brown, and gold. The mouse, Rune, was also dyed a dark shade of green, almost black, and she now wore leaf shaped glasses. Her partner next to her, if I recalled right, is Mikeg. His brownish gold hair was about the same shade as Tobias and both their eyes had the same shade of golden yellow. He wore a simple white long sleeved shirt under a vest that faded from blue to purple and had feathers spread over the shoulders. Over his eyes he had a kind of bright red eyeshadow that was applied lightly. "How is my lovely Tribute this morning? Sleep well sweety?" Aylin asked me as she leaned over the couch from behind me and hugged my head.

"I slept fine, thanks." I say, but for some reasong I couldn't stop looking at Mikeg. And then to Tobias. Jaran must have caught on to what I was probably thinking.

"Miss Aylin. Are Mikeg and Tobias related?" Jaran asked for me.

"My my. Good guess, Jaran. Yes they are brothers." Aylin said as she also walked to the breakfast table. When she said that both me and Jaran immediately turned around on the couch to look at both Mikeg and Tobias. The only similar thing about them is their hair and eyes. Other than that they look nothing alike.

"Ayli~in." Tobias whined somewhat childishly. "I wanted to tell them."

"Sorry, puppy." Aylin said with a grin. "Ask them which of you is older then. I bet the two cuties will be shocked."

"Mikeg, I bet you're the oldest. You're taller than all of us other than Vincent." Jaran says. "Right?"

Miket shook his head. "He is." He said, nodding his head towards Tobias.

"What?!" Me and Jaran say in unision. We both look to Tobias, his huge smiling back on his face.

"Three years older to be exact. I don't know why people would be so surprised to know that I'm the oldest. They usually say it's because of how I dress, but I know I dress just as stylishly as the next person in the Capitol..." Tobias started to babble again so we all tuned him out. Again.

While everyone else was seated at the dining table me, Jaran, and Vincent continued eating our breakfast on the couches. "So today is your first day of training. First off, tell me what are some of your strengths." Vincent asks us. With his plate in hand he leans back in his seat as he waits for us to talk while he listens and eat.

"Most of what I know how to do Azaria knows as well, but she knows a lot more things than I do. I am very good at foraging though. I can find almost every edible plant and if it's not then I can mix them so that it is." Jaran said. "I am also a faster climber than Azaria I guess because I'm lighter, but she's the fastest runner ever. One time she had to run from a pack of wild dogs. She was kind of far from the area where the men in our District works, but somehow she was able to run all the way there and the men were able to drive the dogs off."

"Is there anything else you can think of that you can do? How about something that can help defend yourself. I have no doubt that your sister can easily defend you both if you were attacked by someone in the arena, but what if it was a group of other Tributes? What would you do then?" Vincent asked.

"Azaria has also taught me some basics with defending myself with daggers, axes, and staffs. But I'm not as strong as her." Jaran says.

"Staffs?" Vincent repeated.

"Before our parents died our father taught me how to make and fight with a staff, but that was a long time ago and I haven't practiced in a while. Only when teaching Jaran." I say. "I also know how to track and conceal. Both me and Jaran know how to do basic knot tying. I can also fight with an axe or a dagger well enough, but I'm more better with staffing." I was pretty much done listing off what I could do and waited for Vincent to say his opinion.

Vincent didn't say anything for a while as his pondering gaze shifted from me and Jaran to somewhere around the room and then back to us. "So far you both have a nice set of skills. One knowing more about something that the other doesn't while both are good at most of the same things. It's more than I had expected from both of you, but not at a level that I was hoping. Compared to the Career Tributes you only have the self taught basics of a good hunter and fighter split in two." Vincent said as he looked at both of us carefully. "Today, and for the next three days of training, I want you to do two things. First off, try as many of the stations as you can. Do the things that you know and ones that you don't. When you think you're getting better, maybe even excelling at one thing, try to hold back and keep up the appearance of still needing the basics. Second, I also want you to figure out your own shedule. Today decide on what you will be learning and plan it over the next three days. Make sure you spend about an even amount of time with what you can or want to do. Some you might do repeatedly, some only once. It's your choice but I believe that this would help you more in gaining and refining techniques. Do you understand?" Me and Jaran nod our heads. "Good. When you're ready Tobias will take you down to the training room when it's time."

Some time later Tobias tells us that it's time to go. As the elevator descends to below ground Jaran has kept his face nearly against the glass walls as he watches everything come closer. When the elevator door slides open we step into the large training and join the other Tributes that were already gathered. There aren't as much yet so we wait until all twenty four of us are present. While waiting me and Jaran scan the place, amazed at how so many things could all fit in this one room. There were weapons familiar to me and Jaran and some that we've only ever heard about but never seen, obstacle cousrses, multiple targets, and places where you could work on survival skills. When all the Tributes were all here we were given our instructions, the names of all the different stations that we could go to, and then were dismissed to do as we wished.

I could tell Jaran had become timid again because his face was emotionless and he was standing less than a foot from me so I don't try to push him away and just let him tag along. Tomorrow I'll have to let him be on his own so that he could learn what he needs to learn. As a start we decide to do something that we both know as we head for the nearest station, which was plant identification. Along with some of the plants that our father had shown to us we were then able to figure out the effects of other plants mostly by guessing. After a few trys at what plant could do what Jaran started to make false guesses, especially when others start to join us.

After that have a go at something that we've never done before but what I've always wanted to try after catching a glimpse of a Tribute using a bow and arrow during one of the showings of the Hunger Games in the past years. From what I could see it seemed pretty easy. Take a stance, pull back the string to draw back the arrow, aim, and release. When I try it I find it not so hard but not as easy either. While shooting some arrows the instructor tells me in between shots that in the arena, when using a bow, I should also consider the the wind speed and the direction in which the wind is coming from.

"Even if you have a good target to shoot at and your aim is nice it is the wind that can help you or make you miss. Before you release your arrow you should take your time to figure out where the wind is blowing, even if you can't feel anything. Many things can affect an arrow when in flight." The instructor said. With his guidance I was able to make good shots into a dummy. Jaran is almost just as good, but he could only use a small bow that required little effort. It just wasn't as effective.

Throughout the day, just as Vincent had instucted us, we take about equal amount of time at different stations. Learning those that we think will help us and then refining the things that were taught to us. I find that Jaran is good at throwing knives, and just like before with the plants he starts missing the good spots on purpose and aims randomly. He's not very good with spear throwing nor was he any better with wrestling or hand-to-hand combat but when it came to survival skills he's obviously better at it than me. And I like it that way. As much as possible I would want him to have little to no contact with another Tribute, even if he could probably outdo them in some way I wouldn't want to risk it. It would be just like as if we were living alone at the edge of our District, relying on each other.

"So what do you think about your training?" I ask Jaran as we sat at a table for lunch while the other Tributes scatter or sit with one another.

"I feel tired, Zari. I don't really like this." He says, poking at a piece of bread with his fork. "You're more better with some of the weapons that we tried out."

"That's fine. As long as you can at least handle a few long ranged weapons and keep us alive with the new survival skills you'll learn." I say, trying to cheer him up and ruffled his hair a little. "I'll keep us safe."

After lunch we continued with our training. There were times when Jaran looked like he didn't want to do some of the things that I wanted to try and would look off somewhere else. Every time that happened I would always encourage him to do what he liked and very few times he actually would leave, but he always returned before I could wonder where he had gone off to. One one of the times that he went off to do what he preferred I attempted hand-to-hand combat. Asking the instructor to not go easy on me when I wanted to practice I got several buises and a sore back and head, but I didn't give up on it. I wanted to learn this so that if I am not able to get a weapon at all at least I'll have my fists. After many tries I finally get the hang of the move sets and learning how to read my opponents body so as to be able to predict what they were going to do next.

Judging by the look of the instructor as we sparred I was getting better. There was one moment when I could have landed a really good hit when I planned it out in my head, but then I caught myself, let him block me, and then threw me on my back. For a moment he was confused but then easily caught on to what I was doing and silently went along with me. Even though it looked as if I was failing over and over again and not getting any better he was actually teaching me and helping me. It just earned doubled the amount of bruises from earlier but it also showed that he admired my determination. I was actually happy that Aylin made me wear pants and long sleeves or else Jaran would freak out.

When I was sore and done with that I went over to where Jaran was trying out an obstacle. He dodged well enough and his leaps were good but he didn't watch his surroundings enough and is nearly off balanced most of the time. After a few minutes of watching with my breath held and nearly turning blue I meet him at the end of the obstacle course as he stumbles out. "I don't think I'll be doing that again." He panted as I help him up.

"You did fine. At least you made it to the end." I say as I fix his hair back into place. From the corner of my eye I could see a few of the Careers smirking at Jaran but I block their view with my body as we walk off to another station.

Later that evening during dinner we report what we've done and what we plan to do to Vincent. "For the next three days I'll work mostly on my fighting skills along with some survival. I'll try a few of the obstacle courses but not very often. As a strength I'll stick to staffing with a spear with hand-to-hand and a dagger as a side. And maybe archery because I'm still unsure with it. With Jaran I was able to learn more about some of the plants that would be useful to us and I'll learn how to fish." I say, listing off the things that I found myself good at and the potential of what I could learn. It was already obvious that Vincent had figured out what we were going to do but he was still pleased that we had done what he had told us to do.

"And I bet you, Jaran, are forbidden by your dear sister Azaria to touch any sharp objects." Vincent said teasingly. Jaran couldn't help but smile as he shook his head.

"No, it's not like that. I'm just not as strong enough to do much with a weapon." Jaran says as he thinks back on today. "I'm okay with a bow but not with a big one. I can throw knives and do the slingshot well enough so I'll put that as my physical strenght. But I am more better at doing most of the survival skills that Azaria could also do but not as good." I flick him on the shoulder for that and then scoop up some food as if I didn't do anything. "I guess that's all I have to say."

Vincent just nods. "So you're just going to do the same things that you have always done your whole life. Just to the death." Just then, unexpectedly, Tobias slaps him on the arm in a whimpy way.

"Don't say that, you'll scare the poor things." He said and then turns to look at us. "So how does it feel like learning all those new skill? I bet you just can't wait to try them out. What were your favorite weapons that you tried out?" Vincent rolls his eyes and returns his attention to his food looking as sleepy as ever even though he really isn't.

"Hmph, and you said not to scare them." He mumbles but Tobias ignores him. Aylin and Mikeg aren't here this evening so it's just the four of us. After chatting a little with both of them Jaran's yawn reminded me that we should get some sleep and we say goodnight to the two men.

As we walk to our rooms I look at Jaran. "Well, one good thing about being in the Capitol is that you'll finally be able to fill out. You were so skinny." I say, taking one of Jaran's arms and poking at it and purposely hit a ticklish spot. Laughing he pulls away.

"I am not that skinny. Look at the muscles I got today." Jaran says as he pulls back his sleeve with a triumphant grin to reveal the tiniest indication of his 'muscles'.

"Where, I only see bump on your arm." I tease. By now we had already reached his room, mines being farther down the hall. "Goodnight, Jaran." I give him a hug, kissing him on the top of his head like I always do, and waited for him to go inside.

Jaran kind of hesitated at his door and then looked at me. "You know, I actually forgot to ask Vincent something. I'll go to bed soon, don't worry Zari." He says and then walks back the way we came. I don't question him as I watch him go, just curious what the question might be. Shrugging I go to my room and get ready for bed. Though, getting in the bed itself was kind of a challenge with all the bruises I recieved. Not quite sleepy just yet, but getting there, I decide to take another good look at my necklace. In the dim lighting as I absentmindedly turn it this way and that I find out that the wings are detachable. Curious I take off the wings, slipping it off the tiny figure of the girl it was covering. She didn't have her hands up in prayer as I thought an angel would but she was wearing a white dress, her hair dark instead of light like all angels, her head down with closed eyes, and her arms resting at her side. Uninterested now I slip back on the wings and go to sleep.


	5. Scores and Interviews

Chapter 5

Over the next three days me and Jaran train as much as we can with what we can manage. In those few days I notice with satisfaction that we're both betting better, just not looking like we are. Though what has been kind of surprising me lately is Jaran. He's still the way he his but on the second day of training he actually wasn't that scared to go off on his own. Of course he still told me where he was going before he left but he did so without me even suggesting it. 'I guess with many things to learn in such little time he's getting a little more confident in what he needs to do.' I think. I couldn't help but feel proud of him.

On the morning of the third day of training Vincent asks again about how we're doing. Because he told us not to show what we're improving at when with the other Tributes whenever we get free time after training me and Jaran kind of do our own little training in our rooms. Practicing what we've been taught and then learning just a little bit more from the instructors. Personally I think to just do whatever so that we may learn faster, but Vincent is right. The other Tributes, especially the Careers at least don't pay much attention to us anymore, but they do still keep an eye on each one of us.

"Today, during lunch time, the Gamemakers will call each one of you individually by your district numbers. Being District 7 you're pretty much in the middle, which isn't that bad but you still need to put on your best performance because they've already sat through twelve other Tributes. Do as much as you can, show them what you've got. They've been watching you all and they've probably noticed that you and Jaran have not gotten anywhere in your training, but you can prove to them that you have. That you're worth more. Your scores will obviously be based on how you do in your private sessions. Depending on your scores it can either help you or hurt you either by getting sponsors or while in the games." Vincent up from his eggs at us. "Any questions?" We shake our heads.

"Oop, time to goo." Says Tobias as he jumps up from his seat after looking at the time and me and Jaran follow him to the elevator. "Good luck with your private session today. Do your be~est." Tobias waved at us as the elevator doors closed after we had stepped out and into the training room. After a couple of hours of last minute training, just as Vincent said, during lunch they start to call us up. As me and Jaran sit at one table by ourselves we start to observe the Tributes as they leave. I recognize the ones that I had noted to possibly be careful of, other than the Careers, and at least notice the others.

"Excuse me." A voice says behind us. I had known there were a few Tributes that like to linger at the back of the room while the others stayed in the middle or at the front, but never expected to talk to anyone else but Jaran. Politely we both turn to look at a girl probably about one or two years older than Jaran. "Um...Is...Is it okay if...if I sit with you?" The girl asks. I don't answer immediately as I study her appearance. She has large dark eyes and lightly tanned skin. He light brown hair hung in two slightly long ponytails that were moved to the front in a way that reminded me of a droopy eared rabbit. Acts shy enough to probably be one too.

"You may." I say and tap the spot next to me. Shyly she quickly slides in and keeps her eyes down. "So what's your name?" I ask.

"I'm Aster. I'm from District 10." She says in a soft voice. If the dining room where we eat our lunch wasn't quiet I definitely wouldn't have heard her.

"It's nice to meet you, Aster. My name is Azaria and this little mouse here is my brother Jaran." I say, ruffling Jaran's hair as he leans around me so that he could see Aster better. How did I end up sitting in between two shy little kids? Aster finally looks up to me, not by very much though, and smiles a little at both of us and nods her head. Even though she doesn't say it I kind of already know why she's there, but I decide to play with her a little to see if she'll lighten up a bit with some conversation. "So, Aster. I'm just curious but, why are you here talking with us?"

"I, well I, um. If I cause you some kind of offense I'm sorry. I just wanted to ask you, if you don't mind, um, if it's okay if I..."

"Go on. We're listening." I encourage.

"Um I was hoping that...I could, maybe-" Poor Aster didn't get to finish her sentence because I thought to cut in for her and save her the stress it probably seemed to be causing her.

"Become our allies, right? Is that what you're trying to say?" I ask and she nods her head in confirmation, a slight pink coloring her face. As I look at her I sigh deeply, thinking it through. I wouldn't mind having her as an ally, with or without special skills, but my priority is Jaran's safety. What would happen if, miraculously, it ends up being us three left? What then? I don't know if I could even kill her myself. Then again I already plan on killing myself so that Jaran would live. I guess at least I wouldn't have to live with the guilt. I know it's horrible to have to think these kinds of things, but what else can I do? Not wanting her to get all frightened again because I was being too quiet I decided to just accept her request. For now. "All right."

For the next hour or so, while the Tributes before us are being called up, we ask Aster questions first about herself and what she can do. Just before Jaran was called up for his private session with the Gamemakers we learned that Aster has two older brothers and one older sister, making her the youngest. Her brothers were able to make it past reaping age and are working in the fields with their father. Aster is very good with animals and that's about all that she is good at. During the days of training she was just too weak to be able to do anything no matter how many times she tried to do this and that she just couldn't get any better. Well, that's what she thought. She's all right with working with ropes because she would always repair the harnesses of the animals and she has a good aim with a slingshot when the cattle won't move and needs some kind of motivation.

The whole time we were talking I still couldn't help but wonder why she bothered to talk to us. I'm sure she's seen me how interact with other people compared to just Jaran. Did she really seek me out because she has taken a liking to us or is there more? Well of course there's more. There is always something underneath the appearances when it comes to a life. Then again she might have really just wanted someone to be with. What with her looking so shy and weak I am actually more surprised that she didn't seek us out earlier. I don't really know what to think and don't want to right now.

Soon enough after Jaran was called up it was my turn. "Good luck in your private session, Aster. I'll see you later I guess." I say as I walk off to where I'm supposed to go. As I walk into the training room to face the Gamemakers I give them somewhat of a bored acknowledging glance over, seeing who is actually watching, and walk over to where I was going to start. I didn't exactly have it all planned out in my head what order of what I was going to do, but as I glanced around at the things that I've become familiar over the short days of training I decided to work my way up from skills to weapons.

While quickly making the different kinds of snares that I knew an idea came to me. Why show the Gamemakers one thing at a time, keeping me here longer, when I could do them almost all at once? When I was done with four different snares I put them in a large semi circle and placed dummies in front of them. I then got an axe, a few daggers, two smalll and one big, and a spear. I placed the spear in the middle of the semi circle and the daggers and axe in a line before me while I stood a few feet away from the half circle of dummies and snares. At this time I had no idea what I was doing or what made me even think of it so I started with just throwing the daggers at one of the dummies. I picked up the two small ones, twirling them in my fingers as I aimed at one of the dummies behind me, remembering its position. Whirling around to my left I threw one dagger in a back handed motion, missing my initial spot as it bounced off the shoulder. I threw the other dagger with a straighter hand and this time it hit in the middle of the dummy's head. Looking back I scooped up the bigger dagger with my foot, somehow managing to actually get it on there, kicked it up to my hand and threw it as hard as I could. The dagger stuck firmly into the chest of the dummy as the momentum of my throw sent it backwards and into a snare, catching it successfully around the neck.

I really didn't know how I pulled that off, I was just happy I looked as good as I hoped I did. Next I reached for the axe at my feet and started spinning it in slow circles around me as I walked to the middle of the semi circle. I could move the axe faster around me, as my father had taught me, but I am not used to this kind of axe and was afraid that I might drop it. Even so I put all my focus in not letting go of the axe that I almost forgot to stop where I wanted. Switching it between my hands, behind my back, and over my head I then took a good grip of the axe and threw it at one of the dummies at my right. Just like with the daggers the force knocked the dummy back onto the snare behind it, this time catching it around the waist. That snare in particular was supposed to use the target's weight to tighten up and dig into the skin. Now there were two dummies left untouched in the center while the other two on the ends were in their traps.

Stooping down to pick up the spear I get down into a fighting stance that my body remembers well. Closing my eyes and remembering the routine drills that me and my father did together I start going through the movements of blocking, attacking, and defending while at the same time incorporating what the instructors taught to me about how to fight with a spear and then switching it back to fighting with a staff. I barely think as my body moves on its own accord, knowing when to switch the spear between hands, when to move my feet and where. Near the end I begin to get a sharp sense of nostalgia and tears start to form behind my closed eyes as I think of our parents. Openingmy eyes I quickly aim for one of the dummies and throe the spear at its chest so that it falls into its snare.

Because I'm so close to the last dummy I do a move that uses the opponents weight that drops them to the ground and then kick it towards the the last snare. By now I'm already panting from doing so many things consecutively. Knowing that I'm done I turn to see that at least half of the group of Gamemakers were watching while the rest were not even paying attention as they talked amongst themselves. "Inconsiderate bunch of rainbow colored pigs." I mumbled under my breath as I am dismissed by the Gamemakers.

When I arrived on District 7's floor I flop down on the couch and sighed tiredly. Jaran must have heard my arrival from his room cause he bursts from the hall and tackles me with a hug as if he was trying to get away from someone or something. It happened to be a someone when we see Tobias chasing after him.

"Zari, save me. He's going to tickle me!" Jaran said as he tried to squirm away from Tobias as he came closer.

"Sorry Jaran, you're on your own there." I say and jump out of Jaran's hold as he starts to cry out in laughter. As I watch the two interact I can't help but laugh with them.

"Tobias, tickle him anymore he'll pass out from laughter." Vincent said as he comes from out of nowhere and sits next to me on the other couch while Jaran and Tobias were on the other. "How was your private session?" He asked me.

I shrug my shoulders. "I believe I did well enough to earn myself a decent score. Though only half were paying attention to me." I say. Vincent's eyes narrowed and he sat back with his arms crossed.

"As always." He said in a low annoyed voice that sounded as if he were growling. He sat like that foe a while with with his normal sleepy look. "Jaran, how do you think you did?" Luckily Tobias did stop tickling Jaran long enough so that he could calm down and be able to talk, but he was still kind of out of breath.

"I did everything I wanted to do." He said. "I think I messed up a little with a few things though."

"Were any of the Gamemakers watching you?" Vincent asked, sounding a little angry. His tone was making Jaran a little nervous but ha answers anyway.

"I'm sure there were some. I couldn't tell because I was too afraid to look up. Did I do something wrong, Vincent?" Jaran said.

Vincent sook his head and got up. "No. I'm just upset with the Gamemakers. Every year it's the same for most of the other Districts." Stretching he started to go towards his room. "Wake me up when Aylin and Mikeg arrive."

Later that evening after dinner we were all gathered on the couches to watch the scores for the Tributes. The Careers of course got some of the best scores. By the time it was time for Jaran's turn he was at the edge of his seat looking anxious. He got a six. He looked a bit down at that but he was still able to smile. "At least it's not as low as I though it would be." He said and turned back to the screen for my score. I got an eight.

Tobias then started bouncing around the room while pulling me and Jaran along with him. "Oh such wonderful scores from such wonderful Tributes!" He said and hugged us both. "I am so proud of both of you." Me and Jaran somehow were able to slip out of Tobias' embrace and took our seats back on the couch. No sooner than we had our butts on the cushions Aylin was behind us, leaning over the back of the couch, and giving us both a head hug. I think she likes doing that to make her feel at least a little taller.

"You sweetys did a good job. Can't wait to see you two in your adorable outfits for your interview." Aylin squealed behind us. Rune, now a pretty shade of blue, fell off of her head and landed with a squeak on my lap. Scooping him up in my hand I held him there in case he tried to run away, though surprisingly he stayed there and stared at me. An equally weird mouse for an already odd lady. "Aw, I'm sorry Runey. Come to mama." Aylin gently picked him up and placed the mouse back on her silver haired head. Mikeg, being more reserved than his brother and partner stylist gave us an affectionate pat on the shoulder and a warm smile.

"As I said before. Better than I had expected." Vincent said, giving us a more normal hug which I don't mind returning as a thank you. For Jaran he lifted his open palm up over high over his head. Leaping up Jaran slaps Vincent's hand with a resounding smack of a high five. We spend the next several minutes telling everyone what we both did in our private session. Jaran showed the Gamemakers all the survival skills that he had been working on for the past few days, missed a few good spots on the targets with the throwing knives because he was getting a little nervous when he saw that some of the Gamemakers weren't acknowledging him, but did really good at shooting with his sligshot as he hit the mark almost every single time, one nearly imbedding itself halfway into the target.

When I told them what I did they were even more surprised. "Creative and deadly. Yup, that's my sister." Jaran says, leaning towards me and giving me a tight hug.

"You did good too, Jaran. But we're even better when we're together." I say and I tickle his side. "I'm tired so I'm going to bed." I look to Jaran to see if he was coming after I had stood up.

"I think I'll stay up a bit more and talk with everyone." Jaran says, looking too excited to even go to sleep.

"Not too late then. Goodnight everyone." I say and walk to my room.

The next day me and Jaran are coached on how we were going to appear for our interview with Caesar Flickerman tomorrow. We worked with Vincent on how he wanted us to present ourselves. He said he kind of want us the way we are already when we showed ourselves to all of Panem at the Tribute parade. Of course not in the royal way that Aylin had intended us to look but as loving siblings with a close bond with one another. It would be more authentic and would already stick to the titles that Tobias has already given you was what his words were. "Plus," He said. "It would save us all from unnecessary stress." So instead of trying to find a look for us we spend our hours discussing about the things that we would talk about, how to talk. After that, when we were done with our lunch, I had to work Aylin about learning how to walk in heels with a dress on and other stuff to help me look confident and presentable. Tobais, and Mikeg, were with Jaran for similar stuff yet different. After that ordeal I honestly would say I'd rather fall from a tree than try wearing heels ever again and tripping over those. I just couldn't walk the way Aylin was trying to teach me. I would watch how her feet would fall, how she would walk, but when I tried to copy her I would just collapse onto the ground again and again. Finally she gave up and decided to have me wear stylish boots that would go well enough with the outfit she has for me.

I really have to wonder if it is really necessary to take almost all day to prepare someone for a one evening interview because it's all that my prep team does on the day of the interviews. Prepare. Once they were all done I was so restless I felt like I could run all around the Capitol and not get tired. With my make up already on my prep team leaves as Aylin comes in the room with my interview outfit. After she had helped me get dressed she turned me around so that I could face the large life sized mirror. This time I can actually see myself more better the way I am unlike when I was dressed as a tree queen. Kind of like my other outfit, I am wearing another tube dress that is a very light shade of blue silver that stops at mid thigh. Over it is a long sleeveless cardigan that is connected to a chocker of folded cloth that clips in place with a round black jewel with a leaf pressed in it and is endged with black at the hemming, and when I move it shimmers like light on silver water. There is a kind of small open space between the top of the tube dress and the opening of the cardigan so that my angel necklace is able to be seen. I am also wearing slate colored fingerless gloves that reaches to my elbow, also hemmed with a black line at the base of my fingers and at the end, and silver boots that has a slight heel and black jems like the one on my choker where the laces are held. Half of my hair is put up in a simple style with leaf pins sticking out just like how the pine twigs were. Little parts of my hair was pulled forward in front of my ears and curled slightly to give slight attention to the some sparkly green stuff they put at the edges of my eyes. Despite the slightly uncomfortable feeling of the choker that holds the the shimmery cardigan I feel more pleasant wearing this than the pine tree costume.

"So what do you think, deary? It looks absolutely fabulous on you." Aylin says, barely keeping herself still from excitement as she looks me over.

"I like it. Thank you." I say. And I mean it. I actually did really like the feel of it. Aylin gives a dramatic bow and then hurries me off so that we could meet with everyone at the elevator so that we could go to the interview. As for Jaran he's wearing a light green suit with the jacket open at the front and an oragne shirt under it. His hair was still parted off to the side as usual but it seems to be a bit fluffed up in some way that makes him look even younger. Like a little kid again.

"Oh don't you two just look adorable. Come now, can't be late for the interview." Tobias says as he flits to the elevator and waits patiently for us.

This year Caesar's hair is a stunning purple while everything else about him remains the same like every year. As he interviews the other Tributes my minds starts to kind of wander out of boredom. I still pay attention to the answers that the other Tributes give to Caesar's questions, especially if it's about anything that has to do with the Hunger Games, other than that I just wait patiently until it is my turn. I glance over next to me to see Jaran as he takes in the large crowd. He looks nervous like he always does when he's around new people but he also seems determined to stick to his playful appearance and not let his shyness get the better of him. As if sensing my eyes on him Jaran turns around to look at me and smiles.

"It's almost your turn, Zari. Ready?" He asks me in a soft voice that only I could hear. I nod my head with a smile.

"Are you?" I try to sound as if I was teasing him but I couldn't help putting in a little hint of worry in my voice.

"Don't worry. I'll be fine. Vincent, Tobias, and Mikeg helped me find a way to be more comfortable when I'm talking to Caesar." He says. Reassured I turn back to see Caesar wishing the best of luck to the last Tribute before me.

"Next is one of the bravest of a few Tributes that have ever volunteered for a sibling. Not only did she take the place of another but has become a Tribute along with her own younger brother. Give it up for Azaria Crain from District 7!" Caesar said, gesturing to me as I make my way up the stage towards him. As the crowd cheers I face them with a wave and a small smile. "Aren't you looking sharp this evening. Do all the axes in District 7 look this pretty?" He asks in his own funny way as he turns to the crowd with a huge smile on his face.

"No. It's just me." I say. I almost made some kind of remark to his weird question but caught myself with a smile as I made my reply, happy that my voice made me sound just as confident as my answer sounded. Though I couldn't believe I actually said something like that. The crowd then gives me a round of applause as they cheer.

"My my, such confidence for one with such a heavy burden." Caesar says, a sympathetic look on his face. "To have your brother be in the Games the same time as you. Tell me, how do you plan on going about this obstacle that you two have found yourselves in?"

Just before I answer I look over to Jaran and then back to Caesar. "I chose to become a Tribute for one purpose only." I say.

"And that is?" Caesar asks encouragingly when it looked like I wan't going to say more.

"To stay by him. To do everything I can to make sure Jaran is safely back home. Where he belongs. All my life I have done just that and it won't change. Not now." I answer. From the crowd I hear a resounding aw. They were touched by my words of protection for my brother, of my love and loyalty to him. Caesar must have too because it kind of takes him a moment before he speaks again.

"Yes. I saw that, at the Reaping and at the Tribute parade. You two have such an amazingly strong bond with one another." Caesar says. "So, judging by your dress this evening, am I safe to assume that you are the defensive shield in your brother's life? Or maybe the axe? You seem to fit either of the parts perfectly." I look down at my silver and blue outfit, wondering if that was Aylin's intention. Or maybe to seem like the axes that we use to cut down the trees back at home as Ceasar said.

"Hm, I actually like the sound of that." I say, glad that the mood was starting to get lighter. "The Axe of District 7. Don't you think it sounds great?"

"Of course I think it's great, I came up with it in the first place." Caesar says and we both laugh with the crowd. To my relief the buzzer goes off, signaling that my time is up. "Ooh, out of time. I do hope things work out for you, Azaria. For both of you. I wish you all the luck. I love your necklace by the way. Everyone, Azaria Crain, the Axe of District 7." The crowd gives a loud cheer as I walk away and off the stage to sit next to Jaran, who gives me a hug once I had sat down. "You have to admit, that was very touching. Now we get to hear from the younger brother that you've just got to adore. Let's all welcome Jaran Crain from District 7!"

Once his name was called Jaran jumps from his seat and strides in a kind of bouncy way up to Caesar. As they shook hands Jaran pulls something out of jacket pocket. "Here, I have something for you." Jaran says, giving Caesar a small white box.

"Wow, for me? Didn't I tell you he's adorable?" Caesar says, taking the little gift and turnst to the audience for confirmation. "Can I open it or do you want me to wait till after the interviews?" He asks Jaran, leaning towards him in a kind of conspiring way.

"I don't know. Do you want to?" Jaran asks, his childlike demeanor making him too cute for the audience. Even I found myself smiling, but then again I always smile at Jaran. The gift happened to be a wooden carving of a bird in flight that Jaran had been working on lately before the Reaping. Caesar thanked Jaran and said that he would treasure since it was his first gift from a Tribute.

"So bet you that I'm not the only one here who wants to hear your thoughts about what your sister said. Has she always been like that?" Caesar asks Jaran.

"Yes. Ever since both our parents died in an accident when we were younger Zari has been taking good care of me. I couldn't have asked for a better sister." Jaran said, looking like a kid describing his favorite toy. The crowd starts cheering again, already hooked by Jaran's youthful charms.

"Who wouldn't want such a wonderful person as a family member. I bet some of you out there are wishing you had Azaria as your sister." Caesar says as he sweeps his arm over the roaring crowd as they agreed with him wholeheartedly. By now I am feeling somewhat overwhelmed by how much attention we are getting that I am hopping for Jaran's interview to go faster.

Soon enough I get what I wish as the buzzer goes off and Jaran is back to sitting next to me. Glad that our interviews were all over I sit back in my chair and wait out the rest of the interviews until the last Tribute from District 12 was done. After standing for the anthem we then head back to the Training Center and up to our floors. At this point I am already tired that the rest of the evening goes by as a blur but I still remember that after a great dinner we watch the replay of the interviews. I must have fallen asleep before the screen was able to show me and Jaran's interviews because when it was all over Vincent gently shook me awake.

"You can't sleep now without saying goodbye." He says, a sad smile on his face. Through my sleepy mind I then remember that tomorrow is the Hunger Games. Tobias and Vincent won't be around in the morning so it's tonight that we say our goodbyes. Until now I didn't know how attached I had gotten to the first adults that actually cared for me and Jaran since our parents died. Vincent for his calm advices that always seemed to put me at ease. Tobias for being our ever fun-loving and weird District escort who always managed to keep us all amused. Aylin for caring for me and Jaran in her own fashionable yet somehow motherly way. And Mikeg for looking after Jaran despite not having talked much. After tomorrow we won't be able to see them again. Just that thought alone started to bring unintentional tears to my eyes.

"Oh miss Azaria, please don't start crying now because you'll make me cry." Tobias said, already sniffing as he rushed to give me a big hug.

"Too late, puppy. I can already see those jewels running down your face." Aylin says. She and Mikeg then starts to leave, saying that they will say their goodbyes tomorrow and that tonight should be for Vincent and Tobias.

"I can't believe I'm actually saying this but Tobias, I'm going miss you." I say. I probably shouldn't have said anything because he then starts crying even harder. I let him go so that Jaran could also give him a hug. Tears must have already escaped my eyes without my notice because I am tugged into Vincent's embrace. His arms around me make me feel like I'm safe with my father once again. "Thank you, Vincent. Thank you so much for helping me and Jaran. I know you've done it for the other Tributes before us but.."

"Sh, I understand." Vincent says and pulls away. "You take care of yourself. Don't forget what you've been taught for the past several days." Vlincent then opens his arms for Jaran. "I know I probably don't have to say this but take care of each other."

"Do not worry, Vincent and I will make sure we've gotten you good Sponsors." Tobias said.

"And that we'll help you two as much as we can." Vincent adds. There is a moment of silence between us until Vincents clears his throat. "Both of you should get some sleep. You're going to need your strenght tomorrow." He says. Him and Tobias don't move from their spots until they were sure that we were in our own rooms.

Tomorrow the Games begin.


	6. HG Pt 1: Forest of Forests

Chapter 6

The next morning I wake up once again before the sun rises in the sky. Today is the beginning of this year's Hunger Games. Getting out of bed I prepare for the day, though there really isn't much to do because I'll actually be getting dressed when we reach the launch room under the arena. I find it kind of strange how I don't really feel afraid, nervous, or anything. My mind is just blank. I hope it stays like that, but as the time starts to quickly get closer to the moment when the Games will start my nervousness begins to surface. Doubts start to form in my mind and I try to push them away so that I can concentrate on what I needed to do. With Aylin we head outside to an aircraft that will take us to the arena where I will properly prepare for the games.

When we are put into the launch room I see Aylin had begun to tear up a bit. It may be a little insensitive but I wonder in the back of my mind if she has always been teary eyed whenever her Tributes would enter in the Hunger Games. I leave Aylin to herself as I get myself ready. After I had cleaned myself up and eaten a good enough breakfast that fills me but doesn't weigh me down I tie up my black hair and turn to Aylin. Even though I could easily dress myself I will allow her to dress me one last time. Silently she walks over to me and gives me a hug. We stay like that for a while until Aylin decides to pull away. I didn't want to at first because, for a second, I felt like I was hugging my mother again.

"I'm sure you'll do just fine, Azaria." Says Aylin, calling me by my name for the first time after she met me as she spreads out the outfit that I am to wear in the arena on the table. Before long I'm already dressed in a plain long sleeved black thermal shirt and over it is a darkly colored parka with lightly shaded light patterns as camouflage. Even though most parkas are thick and awkward this one is smaller in build to allow as much easy movement as possible while still keeping you warm in the bitter cold. My pants are made from similar material as my parka with the same design and is tucked in under black mid calf boots that are good for running over various kinds of terrain. At least I know what the weather will be most of the time. Because my outfit is well insulated it takes only several minutes after dressing to start sweating a little from my own body heat.

I look at Aylin with a sad smile. "Judging by the clothes it will be just like home I guess, but maybe colder." I say. Aylin is still teary as she nods silently while we wait for the announcement of the beginning of the Hunger Games. Instead of sitting with an idle mind I ask for paper and something to write with. I've never really been good with school because I was too preoccupied with taking care of my brother but at least I could read and write well enough. In my letter I write specifically to each of the four people who has helped me and Jaran these last days while in the Capitol. I first address Vincent, thanking him for his kindness towards me and Jaran and for being patient with us and for helping us. I also ask him to take care of Jaran when he becomes the victor, that he's a good kid and he won't be a bother. Next I write to Tobias, telling him of how freakishly weird I've always thought he was, even until now I still do, but also telling him to take care and that I appreciate what he has done for the both of us. Whether it was unknowingly cheering us up with his dramatic outbursts or overly praising us for nothing, but in some ways he was also like an older brother that we've never had. For Aylin I thank her for being my stylist, a great one, and that she was kind of like a mother to me. I even wrote in that I was going to miss Rune too, I knew she would probably like to hear that. Lastly I wrote to Mikeg. I didn't really know what else to say but to thank him for being with Jaran and, like Vincent, being good to him.

Satisfied with what I wrote I fold the paper and give it to Aylin so that all of them could read it later, and at the same time there is a voice that tells the Tributes to prepare to launch. We both turn to look at the metal platform of which I am supposed to step on to bring me to the surface. Steeling myself I walk forward until my foot as touched the metal plate and then I turn around to see there are now tears rolling down Aylin's face, even her mouse seems to be squeaking sobs. "Vincent kept forgetting to tell you this but he told me to tell you before you are released in to the arena." Aylin says, somehow her voice doesn't break but she's pretty close. "He says that even though he knows you will do so anyway, to not put all of your energy into protecting Jaran. That you must also think of yourself and that Jaran should be almost as good as you at taking care of each other. He has grown since coming to the Capitol. I can't really remember much but I'm sure he also said somthing about being careful of others if you plan on making an alliance with anyone. Also, he will leave you the choice of how you will approach the Cornucopia. He wanted to make sure that you know the bloodbath that will follow if you got anywhere near the Cornucopia." There Vincent goes again, even now he somehow answers questions that I might have been wondering about and somehow just knowing what to say. Aylin had just managed to say the last sentence when the glass cylinder blocks off her off. I nod my head at her with a semi confidant smile and then I am being pushed upward. I wave my last goodbye to her before I'm swallowed in darkness.

Once my head had already cleared ground level I immediately look around at my surroundings. I couldn't be in a more better environment fit for me and Jaran. For a second it made me wonder if the Gamemakers planned on it but I push that thought away for a later time. On every side we are all surrounded by a large thick forest, even where we are being launched is surrounded by trees but at least we are not blocked from the Cornucopia before us. The Cornucopia itself sits atop a small grassy hill with its contents spilling from the opening. As I look it over and judge the distance of the climb up the hill I feel my legs getting pumped and ready to run for it. At home me and Jaran loved racing each other up hills like this. Sometimes steeper and sometimes higher than what I'm looking at right now. I can make it. I can at least get us one good thing and then I would have to bolt out of there. Running down hill shouldn't be a problem. I quickly take a few more seconds to look at the forest around us and upon closer inspection I see that on different sides this forest is made up of different trees. Juniper, Birch, Elm, Cedar. As far as I can see those are the different kinds of trees on sight, maybe even more all around the arena. Like a forest of forests. As I glance deeper I can see that it gets a little more darker. They made the trees more closer together than they usually would in the natural forests so that it would make it a little harder for someone to run straight, especially with the other foliage, but at the same time it also provided good cover.

Seeing that time is almost up I quickly look for Jaran from the Tributes around me. If he was on the opposite side of the Cornucopia then I won't be able to see him, but I do see him almost hidden from my sight. He was already looking at me, his expression worried probably from me not looking for him earlier. Making eye contact I narrow my eyes and look towards the cedar forest, then I lock eyes with him again, pointing to myself, and look towards the Cornucopia. He understands and looks off in a different direction and points to the cedar trees. It is then that I remember that I already agreed for Aster to join us. I totally forgot.

Before I could dwell on it, however, the numbers six and five pierce through my mind and I get myself ready to run. I am thankful for the shoes because I know that they will help me to get up there faster than the other Tributes. Three. Two. One. About half a second before the gong rings I'm already pushing myself off of my plate, jumping a good enough distance so that I don't step on the ground before it rings, and start sprinting for the hill as I easily gain speed with the boots I'm wearing. Just as I had thought I'm ahead of the Tributes that I can see, though I'm unsure about the ones on the other side, but I push myself harder up the hill. Before I crest the top I quickly snatch up a bag that looks like it could be filled with some good stuff and at the same time I scan for what I can get near the Cornucopia before I go back down. The other Tributes are just about here and I need to move fast. I see a lot of things that I wish I could take with me but I'm already pressed for time as it is. Really hoping that there is a good knife or dagger in the bag I got I grab two bundled up blankets and an axe that just happen to be leaning against them and then I'm off, nearly tripping on my own feet as I hurtle down the hill. The things that I carry start to weigh me down once I reached the bottom of the hill and I almost fall down from the sudden impact of the even ground.

As I run through the thick undergrowth and weave between the tree trunks the realization of what I just did comes to mind. Once I had pushed off that plate I didn't really know what I was doing. I just did it. Originally I was kind of thinking about going halfway between the Cornucopia and my launch plate, but that was before I got excited about where I was. I still couldn't believe I had gotten that close to the Cornucopia without being attacked. Well if you counted that arrow that had nearly took off my ear and landed a few feet in front of me. While I was making the run for the Cornucopia I didn't get to see if Jaran and Aster had listened to my instructions, but knowing Jaran I know he's fine. He knows that I could easily make it up the hill so he should have gone into the forest when they rang the bell, hopefully with Aster right behind him.

After running for what seemed like ages to my aching arms I start to slow down but I don't stop. I'm panting hard but I try to control it so that I can hear if someone is following me or not. Deciding that I could at least rest for a little bit I put my things down and then settle myself on a rock that was almost hidden under the root of a tree. While keeping my ears open for any sign of movement I bring the black and blue bag I had snatched up to me and go through it to see what I got. To my relief I see that there is a knife inside that looks long enough to be about the size of a dagger. Putting that aside I dig more and bring out the stuff inside one by one and lay them out for me to see them all. I have a box containing dried meats, salted nuts, dried fruit, and crackers. Neatly rolled up rope along with two coils of wires that will be good for snares. A sleeping bag with an extra blanket, and two water bottles that were at least filled up. I was kind of hoping for at least a small medical kit with some basic bandages and disinfectant but I was grateful enough with what I got.

After I stuff all the things back in the bag, including the two blankets I got, I pick up the axe and continue on my way. I have to find Jaran. I just hope nobody thought about following him and Aster, or at least ran a different way. Wanting to see my brother now I start walking faster, avoiding making as much noise as I can as I go deeper into the forest. Even though the day is at its brightest the closeness of the trees make it seem like a cloudy day and it is then that I finally notice how cold it is. It feels like it's nighttime in the middle of fall. Very cold almost to snow fall. I can't imagine how much colder it will get once it does become night. Good thing I got those extra blankets, because we're going to need them.

As I continue to walk in an easterly direction I eventually come to a small stream. On the spot from where I stood I was conveniently at a place where I could easily jump across. Before I do, however, I wonder if Jaran and Aster even thought about crossing this stream to get to the other side that now looks like an oak forest. Keeping still and listening to my surroundings again I decide to call for Jaran. When we were younger he would sometimes get lost in the forest at home, especially when it was close to night. Because I was tired of being scared that I wouldn't find Jaran we came up with the idea to call for each other like the wolves do. By howling. Laying my axe close to me on a nearby tree I cup my hands over my mouth and howl as loud as I can. Me and Jaran have practiced many times with the different pitches so that our howls sound just like a wolf if you didn't know the difference between an actual howl and a good impersonation.

It wasn't immediate but I am answered by one of Jaran's howl. He does another one to say that he's safe, but what scares me into jogging to his direction, with my axe in hand, is that there was another howl coming from a different direction somewhere behind me. It's far but not for a wolf who may be hungry. Perfect. So they have wolves here. What other predatorial animals have they put in the arena? I do not continue with that rant in fear that it may be true. After a few minutes of jogging I transition into a fast walk and howl again for Jaran. His answering howl is closer now and in the same direction from where I heard it, so at least I'm going the right way and he's staying in one place until I find him.

I'm about to call for him again when all of a sudden I hear him shouting my name and the loud rustling of someone running through the undergrowth. I immediately sprint towards him and within seconds I break through into a small clearing at the same time Jaran and Aster does on the opposite side. They run until they are behind me and then I see that they were pursued by two other Tributes. Luckily they weren't Careers but I really didn't want to have to fight any Tributes on the first day. Just our luck. "Jaran quickly, in my bag is a knife. Try to bring one down while I distract them." I say to Jaran as I wait for the closest Tribute to get in range of my axe. Unfortunately they have a sword which has a more farther reach than my axe, but it's the best I've got. I wait for him to make the first strike. He's going for an overhead slash so I sidestep to the side where the other Tribute is and dig my axe into his back, severing his spine. Lucky hit. Hurt and angry the Tribute with the sword swings at me with what's left of his dying strength, but he's too slow with his injuries and misses me. Knowing that he would die soon I remove my axe from him and finish off the girl that Jaran had managed to put a knife in from a distance. I had to say, he did get better.

Not wanting the death of the two Tributes to get the better of me I quickly pull my knife from the girl and lead Jaran and Aster away from the clearing. I didn't retrieve any of their weapons because I didn't know how to use any of them. Two cannon fires ressound throughout the forest soon after, signaling the death of the two Tributes. Our first kill. I tried hard not to see their faces, but I couldn't get out of my mind what they must have looked like. Laying there on the blood stained grass with their eyes open in pain. To rid myself of the made up images I look down at Jaran's grim face and Aster's fearful one. I see that there are a few scratches on their faces, probably from running through the trees. Wanting to put some distance between us and the area of the dead Tributes we go to the place we could jump across the stream so that we could be in a different setting. I make Jaran and Aster follow me for a few more minutes into the oak forest before I let them sit behind a thicker trunk that we could rest against.

"So, Azaria. What's in the bag?" Jaran finally asks.

"Survival stuff. There's a sleeping bag that you and Aster can share. I got two extra blankets along with this axe when I made the run for the Cornucopia. There's also some rope and wire, snacks for when we don't have anything to eat, and two filled up water bottles." I say. Before any of them could say something I take out the two water bottles and give them to Jaran and Aster. "Drink up, I bet you two are thirsty from all that running."

"But what about you, Azaria? Aren't you thirsty too?" Aster asks me after taking a large gulp. I shake my head but accept Jaran's silent offer when he starts nudging me in the arm with the water bottle.

"Not that much. There's the stream nearby anyway that we could refill on, though I'm kind of suspecting something about it. I just don't know what." I say. The three of us stay silent for a while as we rest under the oak tree. However, our inactivity combined with the coldness of the arena starts to give us a slight chill. By now the sun is starting to fall and we need to find somewhere safe that we could hide and sleep. Taking up the lead again we begin to head north. Or where I think is north because I can't tell which way the sun is with the trees blocking the light. I don't really plan to go that far, only just so we can warm ourselves by walking, and soon enough we stop again.

"To be honest I really don't know what I'm doing right now." I say as I look at my brother and our little ally apologetically. "All I can say is let's make a little shelter so that we could make a fire. I know that might be a bad idea but I was thinking that if we used the branches with thick leaf coverings it could hold in the smoke and not give us away."

"I guess we could try that out. I don't have any better ideas. How about you, Aster, what do you think?" Jaran looked at the girl who just shrugged. Even though we're already out in the arena and away from the other Tributes she's still being shy. You'd probably think that since she has older siblings that maybe she wouldn't be this shy. Well, it's decided then. For the next few hours me and Jaran climb the trees around us, stripping away branches with nicely bunched up leaves as Aster walks around within our sight range while looking for things that we could eat and keeping watch for other Tributes.

Once I thought I saw a Tribute sneaking up on Aster. They were close enough to my tree that I quickly jumped down and tackled them to the ground. Turned out to be just Jaran fooling around and trying to scare us both as he lay laughing on the ground. I plyfully smack him on the arm and get off him. Knowing Jaran he wouldn't be able to stay serious for very long, even though we are in an arena fighting for our lives. The poor girl was also on the ground panting from fright with her hand over chest and looking at us as if we're crazy.

"Sorry about Jaran. He can be a goof ball sometimes. Though I will say this. Lighten up." I say as I help her up off the ground. Aster gives me a weak smile and nods her head. "There, that's better. So what have you got for us?"

"I uh, gathered some berries that I'm familiar with. We, um, my brothers and I would pick them as our snacks. When we were finished in the fields." Aster says as she shows me a small pile of berries that I've only seen in the training room with the plant identification station.

"Good work, Aster. We can eat those for supper tonight. Me and Jaran were able to collect enough branches to make a decent shelter for the three of us. I'll keep watch next, can you help Jaran set up a little cover over there next to those tall bushes?" Aster nods her head and shuffles over to where Jaran was already sorting out the branches and weaving the leaves and twigs together. While Jaran and Aster work together I take one of the longer and thicker branches that I found and set aside and used my axe to hack away at if for a bit until I've got it to a good height. Taking the knife from my bag I then start making a circuit around the two while I make myself a staff that I can fight with. I do not doubt that some Tributes will risk the cold night to try and hunt for others so at least I can be prepared for them.

After walking about ten laps around our area the arena has already gotten so dark that I could barely make out the dark figures of my brother and Aster if it wasn't for the small flickerings of the fire peeking from behind the makeshift roof of leaves that the two were able to make. By now I'm already halfway done with making my staff so I decide to rest a bit and maybe continue it in the fire's light. It's not the best, not like how our father makes it, but it's strong and sturdy enough to even withstand the sharpness of a blade because of the little extra thickness I left in the middle. While I was busy keeping watch and making my staff Jaran was able to collect more stuff that we could eat. For the first day of the our Hunger Games it's not turning out so bad. Yet.

Just then the Capitol's anthem starts to play and then they show the faces of the dead in the sky. At first I don't think to watch but then I figure that it would be a good way to see how many left of us there are. While counting the faces I see in the sky I think that there should at least be slightly more than half dead. The Cornucopia was on top of a small hill that you spend most of your energy trying to climb to get to what you want to get. By the time you get there you're pretty much too tired to defend yourself thus leaving you vulnerable to whomever still has enough energy to spend to kill you. Then for those who managed to get something and start running off there is also that chance of being hit on your way down by a distance weapon. Like what almost happened to me with that arrow. That was too close to my liking. Finally the anthem song stops and the pictures fade, leaving the night sky dark and fifteen Tributes dead. And I contributed to that fifteen with that girl and boy that me and Jaran killed. I even flinched when I saw their faces in the sky.

"Forgive me." I whisper to myself and then look back down to continue carving out my staff while the three of us eat dinner. Since our little leafy shelter isn't that tall we make sure to keep our fire low and as close to the ground as possible, but we're happy enough to have what warmth we could get from it. Because it is nighttime we can now hear the calls of predatorial animals in the distance, even that lone wolf howl that I heard when I was calling for Jaran. Hearing it closer than the others brings me to my feet with my half done staff at the ready. I'm not afraid to fight it off to protect the two kids behind me, but I'm worried if it has a pack and it's the only one howling. I know that's not normal if it did have a pack but you never really know when you're in the arena. For several long minutes I stay still and listen hard for any sign of danger, scanning the black darkness of the forest and failing to see much. I vaguely feel myself shaking but I'm unsure if it's from apprehension at what could happen if we were attacked now or from the coldness of the arena.

"Maybe, maybe it will leave us alone." Aster says with her usual small voice. I look back at the two and smile softly at them. I look once more around, squinting in vain, and then sit down at the edge of our small shelter.

"I'll take first watch. I want you two to go to sleep right now. I'll wake you if there's anything happening. Jaran, I'll wake you for second watch. And don't worry too much, Aster. We'll all be fine." I say.

"You know, you're starting to sound like Vincent." Jaran says as he lets Aster get into the sleeping bag first with her blanket already wrapped around her. When I thought about what I said, and how I said it, I couldn't help smiling along with Jaran.

"That should be a good thing then. Just hope I don't start acting sleepy like him though." I say. I'm not sure if the others were able to hear that comment but I do wonder how Vincent would respond to that. Jaran chuckled lightly at that, wrapped his own blanket around himself, and then got into the sleeping bag with Aster. Luckily the two are small enough to fit inside with their blankets and still have some space to move around a little. Before settling down to keep watch I rearrange the leaf covering so that it could better hide the dying flames and could easily sit at the opening while still keeping warm. Before Jaran could fall asleep I ask him something that I was just curious about but of little importance. "Jaran?" I call out in the dark.

"Yes, Zari?" He answers sleepily.

"I was just wondering, but, you gave Caesar that carving of your favorite bird. The swallow, right? Why did you?" I ask. I hear the slight sound of the ruffling of cloth as Jaran shrugged in the sleeping bag.

"I knew I wouldn't be able to work on it more when we got into the games so I gave it to someone who might appreciate it and maybe even paint it." Jaran says. It was my turn to shrug at the answer. It didn't make much sense to me but that was his answer. After that I didn't say anymore as I stared into the darkness.

Through the first several hours of my watch my mind starts to wander back to home. To our parents. I wander about what would happen if I die early in the games and leaving Jaran to himself. I also think about how I would probably feel if something were to happen to Aster. Of course I don't like the idea of her dying but I wouldn't like it even more if it's me that has to end her life if it came down to the three of us. The subject changes in my head keep me awake even past my amount of time but I don't wake Jaran up yet. I was about to decide to stay up all night when I remembered what Vincent told Aylin to tell me. If the cameras were focused on us I bet Vincent would be sleepily glaring at the screen and mentally growling at me to go to sleep already. Mentally smiling to myself I wake Jaran up and go to sleep next to Jaran.

The next morning I wake up to see that Jaran had fallen asleep and Aster was gone. Shooting up from my sleeping position I quickly shake Jaran awake and walk off in different directions looking this way and that. I wanted to call out for Aster but if there were Tributes nearby they would hear me and either go after her or us. Where did she go?

Just then she moves away from a tree and looks surprised to see me and Jaran awake. She starts to play with her fingers when we both look at her questioningly. "I had to, um, I had to. Pee." She said. Sighing to myself I walk back to our little camp.

"Come on, let's eat a little breakfast and move one. If the arena really is made up of different kinds of trees then I hope to find that they have made a pine forest somewhere around here." I say, sitting down next to Jaran and eating some of the leftover berries that we saved from last night.

"Then it will really be like we're back home." Jaran says.

"That's right. You're from District 7. So you're used to living in the forests." Aster says, stating it rather than making it into a question.

"Debinity. Eber tince ve ver dyounger." Jaran said through a mouthful of berries and nuts.

"Chew before you talk or else you'll bite you tongue." I say as I cover his mouth. When I said the routine instruction to Jaran whenever he always had his mouth full the unwanted thought of not being able to say it again entered into my mind before I could stop it. At least my voice doesn't belie the sudden pang I felt then while I talked to Aster. "Our parents died when Jaran was five and I was ten. Luckily our father taught us enough of his skills to survive on our own, but even so we still had our hard times. Everyday since then it has always been me and Jaran. We probably could've asked for help then, work for food or feed ourselves if we had shelter. I don't know why not but I found it better if it was just the two of us. Besides I bet whoever we could've lived with wouldn't have allowed us to practice with what little skills we had or permitted us to go out into the forest."

"I'm sorry about you parents. You two were so young." Aster said.

"It's okay. If any it has just made us stronger, but we still miss them nonetheless. We should get going. Even though the sun is rising we'll still be frozen if we stay here any longer." I say. Picking up my bag I start to pack everything up while Jaran and Aster broke camp, stamping out the fire and scattering the branches here and there. It probably isn't the best way to cover our tracks but it's the quickest.

When we were all ready to leave we continued north but then later changed directions and headed where we thought west was. Because the trees are so close together to form a solid green ceiling it was beginning to become frustrating to not see where I was going. The only break for sunlight that we were able to get was when we came to another stream. This time it was wider with a more faster floe than the last one we were at.

Not yet ready to cross we take a rest on a bunch of boulders that have been slightly warmed by the sun and fill up our water bottles. We also make sure to drink plenty of water while we're there because it will probably be a while before we reach another source of water. From what I can tell the streams seem to set the boundaries of the different kinds of forests in the arena because on the other side I see that we will be crossing over to... Well, into a kind of forest I don't really know about. The trees themselves are as thick as stalks but as tall as any tree and lines that seem to cut the thin trees into sections. The only greenery that they have are thin long leaves that stick out in small groups here and there all over the tree so at least we will be able to travel in light for a while, though the trees are even closer than ever with just enough space for someone to pass.

Deciding that we've rested enough we prepare ourselves to cross the stream. Earlier I had asked Aster to gather some light medium sized sticks so that we could tie them together and put our stuff on it as we cross the water because I found out that it's actually deeper than it lets on. Out of necessity we take off our parkas and pants and stuff them into my bag so that they are dry and warm after we cross the stream. Jaran and Aster a little hesitant at first, slightly shivering once they were out of their parkas even though they still have their thermal shirts.

"Zari, it's too cold. Do we really have to cross this?" Jaran whines. I understand what he means and I don't even like my idea, but as far as I can see I don't see the stream narrowing any time soon. Just then we hear some heavy rustling behind us. Whirling around and keeping the two behind me we see a bear stomping his way towards us. Wolves, bears. What else is there? Without being told Jaran and Aster immediately get into the water, grabbing our stuff, as I come in after them while keeping an eye on the bear. He had seen us trying to run and attempted to catch us, but by the time he was standing and roaring at the spot we were just standing we were already of the flowing stream. Because the current was strong we let it take us down stream as we try to get to the other side at the same time. However, we're not that lucky.

Just when my foot finally feels the soft ground under the water we see a long animal resting on the banks on the other side, spotting us as we pass by. It makes a hissing like sound as it starts to move towards us with its short stubby legs and its large long jaws eagerly open to crunch down on us. "Aah! Azaria hurry we have to get back on land. At least on land." Aster screams as she clings to both me and Jaran and looking fearfully at the creature as it starts to enter the water.

"Why? What is it?" I ask as I start to feel a little panicked by Aster's reaction. Seeing another thing new to me I feel like regretting about not paying attention in school, but then again even Jaran didn't know and he has read most of the books back in our District.

"I-it's an alligator. And you don't want to be in the water when it's around. Hurry please, I don't want to die." Aster says and starts hugging me tighter. Pushing myself to swim faster while pulling Jaran and Aster along with me and holding the craft thing with our belongings I dig my feet into the soft muddy ground to try and pull us towards dry land. When Jaran and Aster could now touch the bottom I turn around and see that the alligator creature was already closing in on me, and what was scary was that I didn't see it at first because of how well its dark skin let it blend into the color of the water.

"Zari, catch!" Jaran yells and throws my half done staff to me. Still trying to move away from the creature in knee deep water and keeping one eye on it I somehow manage to clumsily catch my staff. Just in time too. Once I had the staff ready in my hands the alligator lunged at me with its jaws wide open. Luckily it was kind of far enough from me so that even as it came closer I had enough time to smash the unfinished branch part of my staff right on its snout. Knowing better than to linger any longer after it's distracted somewhat I continue to move backwards and away from it. The alligator made a loud hissing kind of sound and tried to get at me again, but it was still in the water and I was already running after Jaran and Aster into the odd trees.

The scare from the strange creature had at least got our blood pumping enough so that at least we felt a little warm after getting out of the water despite the cold air. Once we were at a good distance away from the stream we quickly got our parkas and pants out of my bag and put them on before we started shivering. Like I had hoped the parkas felt nice and warm and dry after swimming in the cold water, we even wrapped our own blankets around ourselves for good measure.

"Okay. I promise." I say as I untie my hair to try and dry it off. "No more swimming." The three of us look at one another for a moment and then burst out laughing. Yup. That's what happens when you're with me and Jaran. You nearly get killed and then laugh about it later. I kind of wonder when we'll start taking these things seriously.


	7. HG Pt 2: Betrayed

Chapter 7

It takes us about four days to get out of the forest of thin trees with lines in them because it was kind of hard to get through them as easily as the other ones we've been in. There were times when there were a bunch of them and no matter how hard we pushed through they were just too strong, so we had to find a way around them. On the second day we ran into another bear, but it was black and white instead of just black or just brown. I've got to say that it actually looks more cuter than the other bears that I've seen before but it is still a predator that could harm us. And that's what it did. I was just happy that I had finished carving out my staff from that thick branch before we had seen the bear, though I had doubted that it would probably be any good against hundred pounds of muscles with teeth and claws.

Just like the brown bear when we were crossing the stream, when the black and white bear saw us he started coming for us. It was more agile in this tight forest of thin trees that it got to us rather quickly. Unfortunately Jaran was behind me when I had pushed Aster in front of me when we started running, which was obviously a bad mistake on my part. Whirling around to see the bear on top of Jaran I whacked the bear on the side of the head. I was originally aiming for the nose but it was too close to Jaran and I wasn't that good of a hitter. Roaring the black and white bear had stumbled back, shaking its head and glared at us with red eyes. I knew then that it, and maybe the other animals in this arena, were altered by the Gamemakers, making it harder to defend yourself the way you usually would if it was a real bear.

Jaran had quickly gotten up and away from the bear but his arm was hurt and bleeding. Angry I had stepped between the altered bear and Jaran and Aster. I didn't want to take the chance of Jaran getting hurt further and one swipe from the bear's paw would instantly kill Aster with her small body. Before the black and white bear could charge Jaran was able to throw the axe at it from behind me and hit the bear solidly on it's shoulder. The bear had reared up again with a roar of pain and I took the chance of piercing it right through the heart. I knew we had won but then it swiped at me when it fell dead on the ground, giving me a long scratch from the side of my forehead and ending at my jaw. I was so angry at the bear for hurting Jaran that when we decided to eat it I had made sure to burn the head till it was ashes.

What we didn't know was that the bear's claws were laced with poison. So on the morning of the third day my head really started to hurt till I could barely walk straight and Jaran's arm was burning as if it was on fire. Poor Aster worried over us. There was nothing she could do but try to keep us warm with the blankets, give us a little water from the bottles, and try to keep watch for us. The poison was slow and painful and I actually thought me and Jaran were going to die. Then a white parachute came down and landed in front of Aster. When she picked it up she said that there was a message from our mentor Vincent and some kind of liquid medicine and ointment. The message said to take the medicine and put ointment over our wounds because both were types of antidotes and that we should rest so that we would heal.

I really was touched by such an expensive gift that I actually felt a little teary. Me and Jaran had spent most of that day resting and then when we thought we could move on we slowly made our way west. On the fourth day me and Jaran were feeling much better and were able to cover the distance lost when we couldn't move. Thanks to Aster and Vincent we were able to live with our scars fading rapidly from the antidote ointment. During those four days only one other Tribute was killed leaving only eight of us left including me, Jaran, and Aster.

"Finally. Something familiar." I say in exasperation when we come to another stream and see a pine forest on the other side. Being more cautious I look up and down the seemingly calm stream for any of those long alligator creatures that we encountered when crossing from the oak forest. I tried out the water and this time it was only about as high to my waist and to the middle of Jaran and Aster's stomachs. The flow wasn't as fast as the last time so at least we wouldn't be pushed down stream. Repeating what we did at the other stream with our clothes we quickly make it across to the other side, feeling somewhat paranoid with the feeling of being watched. Though that was probably caused by Aster looking over her shoulder every now and then that got me a bit jumpy myself.

Once we were on the other side with our parkas back on and blankets wrapped around to keep us warm after our little wade through the stream we started to walk deeper into the all too familiar forest, yet at the same time it wasn't the same. As we walked I couldn't help but compare these pine trees to that of the ones in our District, touching the rough bark as we pass and inhaling deeply to smell its scent. Oddly I am suddenly reminded of the ridiculous costumes that Aylin and Mikeg made me and Jaran wear at the Tribute parade and I couldn't help smiling to myself.

"What are you smiling about, Zari?" Jaran asks. He was standing in front of me with Aster just a few feet ahead. I must have stopped while I still had my hand on a tree and the two of them noticed.

"I was just thinking about making a dress out of the pine needles so that we could give Ayline and Mikeg a good laugh." I say. Jaran smiles and shakes his head.

"Come on, we've got to make camp before dark. Remember, we're in the cold again." Jaran says linking his arm in mine and pulling me along.

"What are you talking about, it's always been cold in this frozen arena. Actually it should be snowing at this temperature." I say, ruffling his hair and then linking my other arm with Aster, who was looking around again and looking like a fidgety rabbit. "Okay Aster, seriously. Are you always this shy at home?"

Aster shakes her head. "N-no. I'm just worried that stronger Tributes would find us. Or the Careers..." She trails of in her sentence as she looks around the trees again. Me and Jaran look at one another and shrug our shoulders. I'm doing the best that I can to make her feel comforted with me and Jaran around but I don't know what else to do. I am also scared for a confrontation but I know that it's inevitable in the Hunger Games. Bluntly put, in order to win you've got to kill someone at least once or be killed yourself... okay I don't want to think about that until I have to.

We walk in silence for about an hour or two before we decide to stop. Me and Jaran feel a little tired from still trying to recover from the poison so we decide to climb up a tree and sleep in there instead of on the ground. After we set our things up in a tree Jaran helps me make some snares because in the time that we were weak from poison we only rationed what we had in the box of food I had in my bag and the saved meat from the weird bear. Now there were only a little bit left in the box and all the meat was gone. So after setting up the snares me, Jaran, and Aster spread out so that we could look for some berries that we could gather to eat for tonight and tomorrow we could check the traps.

When it started to get dark I called for Jaran and Aster to go back up the tree and wait for me. After gathering a few more berries from the bushes I was working on I had just turned around to go when I see something approaching me from my side. Pulling out my completed staff in a defensive stance I turn to confront whoever it was. In front of me is a silver wolf. I braced myself for an attack but as I looked closer at the wolf I could see something wasn't right with it when it wouldn't move any further. Cautiously I took one step towards it and then another, the whole time the wolf kept its eyes on me and mines on it. I noticed that this wolf's eyes wasn't red and looked like any other wolf. Maybe they had a mixture of natural animals and altered ones, I think.

It then lowers its head, pulls its ears back in submission, and that's when I notice that there's a broken arrow stuck on one of his back legs. Lowering my staff but still keeping it at a ready I walk slowly towards it until I'm standing so close to it that all the wolf would have to do is to stretch out his neck to touch my arm with his nose. He makes a kind of pitiful whine and tries to step away from me but nearly stumbles on his hurt leg. "It's okay. I won't hurt you. Just don't hurt me." I say as I slowly lower myself next to the wolf until I have one knee on the ground. The wolf looks back at me with its ears still flat against his head but doesn't move. Carefully I place my free hand around the arrow, ready to retreat if the wolf should show any sign of aggression, but all he did was look worriedly back at me, seemingly scared. I take a firmer grip on the arrow, still watching the wolf, and then pull it out in one swift movement and quickly moved back.

The wolf yelped and even twisted his body that his head nearly hit my arm. He was still slightly limping with his hurt leg but other than that he seemed happy as his tail started to sway slightly from side to side. With the blood flowing freely the wolf craned his head around to lick his wound. Relieved that he was going to be okay I back away a few feet and then turn around to go back to Jaran and Aster. Just as I had said they were waiting for me up in the tree we decided to stay in and they were already eating their share. "Hey, why are you two eating without me?" I tease as I start to climb up the tree and rest on a branch below them. The tree that we had picked out was perfect. It was tall and had sturdy branches with full bristles that could easily cover us from eyes and even keep some of the cold breeze at bay.

"What took you so long then, Zari." Aster said as she tossed me my share of food that was wrapped up in a small cloth. She's starting to call me that since Jaran's been saying it an awful lot. He might as well. He won't be saying it much after this. While I ate I told them about the injured wolf that found me. How it didn't attack me like the other animals that we've encountered and that maybe not all the animals placed in the arena were altered by the Gamemakers. Jaran was obviously fascinated by the fact that the wolf, an injured one, allowed me to be so close.

"Who knows why it didn't try to attack me. If it's fur was coated in poison then we'll know in the morning." I say. After a few minutes of silence the anthem came on and showed one Tribute that died today. Now there's just us and the Careers. All of a sudden the lone wolf howl that we've been hearing pierces through the dark really close to us. In the dim darkness I look up at Jaran and Aster on the branch above me. "Try to get some sleep. We'll all need it for whatever tomorrow will bring." I say, concluding that the wolf was probably saying thank you for saving it but it will start hunting us now. Aster tosses me my blanket and I relax to sleep while Jaran and Aster rest on separate branches wrapped up in their own blankets after putting our stuff away in the sleeping back that I put in front of me.

I was so tired last night that I wake up when the sun was already up, yawning groggily as I try to remember that I'm in a tree and shouldn't move too much or else I'd fall. Rubbing my eyes I look up to see Jaran was just about waking up. Smiling I then look for the branch that Aster was supposed to be. She was not there. Leaning forward and away from the tree I try to look through the pine needles to see if I can spot her. Then I look down and see, lieing at the base of the tree, the wolf from last night. As if sensing my eyes on him he looked up at me and gave me a kind of wolf smile as his tail starts to wag.

"Hey Zari, is that the wolf from last night?" Jaran suddenly asks beside me. I didn't even hear him move next to me so I nearly fall out of the tree with his sudden appearance. Nodding I carefully pick my way down while watching the wolf below, Jaran following curiously behind me. "How was Aster able to make it past him?"

I shrugged. "Maybe he wasn't there when she had to go down?" When me and Jaran reached the last branch we waited to see what the wolf would do now that we were closer. Seeing that he was no threat, for now, I jump down first. Once my feet touched the ground the wolf was already at my side with his head down as he began to sniff me, then he lifted his head to look at me with a whine as he started pawing my leg.

So that's the reason why he's being so friendly. He's hungry. "Don't just sit there laughing. come down here so that he could nibble at you while I look for food and Aster." I say to a giggling Jaran. When he was on the ground the wolf repeated what he did to me to Jaran. As I watch the wolf interact with my brother I remember the first time we met Vincent and how my first impression of him was of a wolf. "Come on, let's see if our snares caught anything. Maybe Aster is checking on them for us." I say as I start to walk away after getting my bag from Jaran.

Pulling himself away from the wolf Jaran follows next to me with the wolf sniffing at our heels and whining every now and then. He's like a pup in an adult's body. No fear but not so open. Reaching the hiding spot of one snare me and Jaran are glad to see that we caught a good sized rabbit.

"I hope that our other snares have caught something, then we can give the other rabbit to the wolf." Jaran says as he takes the rabbit from the snare while I try to hold back the wolf from trying to get at our catch.

"If you're going to stay with us you'd better wait your turn." I say firmly and tapped the wolf on the nose. He instantly pulled back with a sneeze and put his ears down. "Now where's Aster?" Not seeing her,anywhere I try to hide the slight panic in my voice.

"I-I'm here." Aster pants out as she comes from out of nowhere and sounding as if she ran a distance to get back to us.

"Aster, where did you go?" I said as I folded my arms. She really needs to stop disappearing like that.

"I was, um, I was just at the snares, and I, uh, found a few rabbits and a squirrel stuck in them." She said and held up two rabbits and the squirrel. She still seemed to be a bit jumpy but other than that at least she was okay. Jaran obviously thought that we had enough to eat so he threw the single rabbit to the wolf who was waiting patiently beside us. Only then did Aster noticed him as she jumped back with a surprised shout. "Th-th-there's a wolf next to you!" She said freaking out. I gave the wolf a slightly bored look. "I-is that the wolf you helped?" She asked after I had given her a moment to think.

"Yup, and it's been following us since this morning. Didn't you see him when you climbed down from the tree this morning? He looked like he was there mornings he sun even came ip." I said. Aster shook her head but she didn't seem frightened of him anymore at least and was breathing normally. As the wolf ate his rabbit I went about cooking our breakfast with one of the rabbits and the squirrel, saving the other one for lunch or dinner.

During the rest of the day we walked aimlessly around the forest, keeping ourselves warm with the simple exercise while looking out for any sign of danger or other Tributes. I was hoping that the wolf would get bored of wandering around with us or leave because we were not paying attention to it. But he stayed, only going off on his own every now and again to probably hunt something because he came back one time with a bird in his mouth.

In the afternoon while we were resting we started to hear the wolf growling. At first I thought he was about to attack so I stood up to face him, but he wasn't growling at me. All three of us looked in the direction where the wolf was indicating but we couldn't see anyone or anything.

"No. They're here. They shouldn't be. Not yet." Aster said as she started to back away, her eye darting in every direction. "They lied to me." Hearing what Aster had just said I whirl around to look at her.

"What do you mean 'not yet'?" I ask her while still keeping an eye in the direction that the wolf was growling. I'm starting to think him more reliable than the girl before me. Aster looked at me with so many emotions running across her face. Fear. Anger. Worry. Shock. Her breathing even sped up to the point that she sounded as if she couldn't sanymore enough air. Then all of a sudden Aster broke down into tears, her legs shaking as they tried to keep her standing.

"Azaria. I'm so sorry. You and Jaran have been kind to me all this time." Aster says, collapsing to her knees and looking at me with tears in her eyes.

"What is it, Aster?" I ask. I already have an idea of what she's talking about.

"Before I met you and Jaran the Careers came to me one time during training. They already knew that you and your brother were hiding your real talents so that you could appear harmless. They just played along with it. Especially you, Azaria. They could see it in your eyes. How determined you were to protect Jaran. They knew that you couldn't have that much confidence with insuring your brother's victory without hiding something that could prevent them from winning. From the start they already saw you as a threat." Aster sobbed

"So, your timidness was an attempt to make us think you really just wanted to be with us?" I ask, kind of surprised that I sounded so calm when I'm having mixed emotions right now. Anger at myself for not listening to myself and to Vincent. Pity for the young girl that was used for selfish gain. Frustration for not seeing the signs of betrayal sooner. Her disappearances, her jumpy reactions, the worrying looks over her shoulder.

Aster shook her head. "No. I have always been shy, but not as much when I approached you from the first time we met. I was scared and the Careers were threatening me. They wanted someone to ally with you in the arena so that they can know what you can do. They said that they would not pursue us if I did what they told me to do. And they haven't. Those other Tributes were just coincidences. but I've been telling them about you. Everything that you've told and showed me." Aster chocked back a sob. "From when we first met I already knew you were suspicious of me and my intentions and was hoping that you would turn me away, but at the same time I wanted you to accept me. Even though you didn't know me you cared for me like my brothers and sisters would, you protected me. And I betrayed you."

"Told ya she would blab. She's too weak to do even the simplest of instructions." Said a voice that came from behind a tree. I was immediately on my feet inserting myself between Jaran and Aster and the Careers as they stepped out from behind their hiding spots. One by one they started to close in, flashing their weapons as they tried to surround us. Moving back I kicked Aster to her feet and told her to get up and keep moving back. If the the Careers manage to get around to my back then our chances of escape will be nearly impossible even if there was only three of them. The male Tributes of 1, 2, and 4.

"Get out of the way, 7. We're not here for you. Yet." said another Career Tribute.

"So why don't you run along for now. It won't be that much fun hunting you when you're trying to protect your little traitor." Said the first one.

"Then again, we could just kill all of you right now if you wish." Said the third Tribute.

As I look at each of them I know that I could probably hold my own against one of them, but not all. 'Maybe we can try to at least outrun them.' It was probably the weakest idea I've ever had, but it was something. However, before I could even whisper my instructions to the two kids beside me an arrow from behind digs itself into Aster's side. Acting fast I instantly spring into action as I quickly pick up Aster, thankful that she's light, and start sprinting away from the Career Trubutes, Jaran not too far behind with the wolf easily keeping pace next to him. I may be faster than the Careers but with the extra weight of Aster on my shoulders it slowed me down a little.

Because the Career are more better rested than we are they start to gain on us. I was about to make a turn to try to take them through the thick undergrowth but an arrow hits a tree close to my head that I makes me change my mind. Hearing someone skidding to a stop behind me I take a quick glance around to see that the wolf had turned the other way. Teeth bared and snarling with aggression he charged at the group of four Tributes and attacked the one with the bow, her teammates stopping momentarily to try and get the wolf off of her. Turning back around in time to not crash into a tree I send a sorrowful thank you to the wolf, already knowing that we weren't going to see him again. Even though it was short he was a good friend to the end.

As me and Jaran run for our lives I try to run more smoothly so that I wouldn't aggravate Aster's wound any further, but that was kinda hard to do when you're running on the uneven grounds of a forest. Along with her groans of pain she's also crying at my back to put her down. "Leave me, Azaria. I'm going to die anyway." I didn't say anything. "Azaria, please. Put me down. I really am sorry I betrayed you. Leave me so that they can kill me and you and Jaran could get away for a-"

"Stop acting like that. Now be quiet or they'll hear you." I say. Not wanting to think about anything until we can find a place to rest I keep my mind somewhat blank as we pass the trees, the familiarity of them is a bit calming. But Aster persisted in talking.

"When you and Jaran were suffering from the poison and your mentor sent you those antidotes there was anothing thing in the message that I didn't tell you. He said to remember what he said about your allies. He was trying to clue you in that I was a threat to your survival. Also when we were sleeping in the tree last night a parachute came for you, giving you another warning about me and I took it before it could wake you up. Then after that I went to go find the Careers..." I knew what Aster was trying to do by telling me all these things but I still wouldn't put her down even though she was revealing every act that she had done against us. In the back of my mind I couldn't help but notice that this was the first time that me and Jaran has ever heard her talk too much without nearly stuttering with her soft voice, but her voice was beginning to grow weaker. Aster's right about her dying soon, but despite what she did to me and Jaran I couldn't find it in myself to leave her to the very Tributes that had intimidated her into doing what she did. She didn't deserve that. She is young and was easily cowed by the Career's show of force and the promise that she would not be harmed.

Finally me and Jaran collapse near a clearing that I could see through the trees. Panting heavily I turn my head this way and that, trying to see if I could catch a glimpse of any of the Careers if they were able to follow us this far. Now I really did wish that the wolf was still with us, but he saved us from the Careers and was most likely dead by now. Aster's whimper of pain brought me back from my thoughts and I bend over her wound. Because the arrow was sticking out on both sides of Aster's front and back she was laying on the ground awkwardly on her side while trying to keep still.

"This is going to hurt, but try to keep from screaming." I say as I start to break off back end of the arrow. Even though I didn't give her much of a warning Aster shuts her eyes tight against the pain and bites down on her arm, her scream muffled by her parka sleeve. Just as quickly as I had broken the back end I then yanked out the front part of the arrow out of her body. I didn't mean to cause her more pain just by doing that but the arrow was at least finally out. Taking out a blanket from my bag I use her parka jacket to tie up her wound and then wrapped the blanket around her to keep her warm. "Jaran, you stay with her. Don't worry, I'll be right back." I say as I get up and start walking away.

I of course don't walk too far because it was starting to grow dark, but I wanted to have a little time alone. While I lean my back against a tree I absentmindedly stare in the direction from where we came from, half expecting to see the Careers coming our way but hoping that the wolf had done enough damage to them to keep them away for tonight. Then I look towards where Jaran is looking after Aster. What am I doing? I know I should be mad at her, but that's not how I feel right now. I probably should have left her there, but I didn't. Now that I think of it I feel somewhat relieved that she's not dying by my hands. I really don't know what else I'm doing just standing around so I collect some wood for fire and return to Jaran and Aster.

As I took my turn to watch Aster Jran goes off to see if he could find something that we could eat for tonight. I wanted to save the last rabbit for our breakfast tomorrow. Me and Jaran are going to need our strenght for when we face the Careers. From dusk til it was fully dark I hold Aster as both me and Jaran try to keep her warm as her life starts to fade. Before she left she weakly said her goodbyes to us and asked us to tell her family that she was sorry for what she had done to us and to tell them she loved them. In the night the single sound of the cannon marked her death. Promising to do as she asked me and Jaran took her body and we lay it in the middle of the clearing so that the Capitol people could take her. Once they were gone me and Jaran said nothing as we settled down to sleep, knowing that tomorrow will give us the opportunity to avenge her death.

The next morning we're awakened by the slightest rustling noise. We didn't use the sleeping bag because we wanted to be up and ready if the Careers were to find us when we slept. With my staff in my hands, the knife in Jaran's, and the axe between us we start to back up towards the clearing where it will be easier to fight them. While Jaran keeps an eye out for them I look around the clearing for a place that Jaran could at least hide in. On the edge of the clearing slightly behind me off to my right there is a large bush that is covered by an overhanging branch full of pine needles.

"Jaran, I want you hide in there, or maybe up one of those trees. I don't want you on the ground when they arrive." I say to Jaran as I point to the bushes.

Jaran looks at me with a small glare and shakes his head. "No. I'm staying with you, Zari." he said. "You can't fight them alone. I can help. You know I can."

"I do know. But if you're really going to help me you can wait out of the way and watch my back. You have better aim than me and can throw the knife and the axe well enough." I quickly look back to the trees and can hear them coming closer. I needed to get him out of sight. "There are only four of them, three if the wolf was able to kill one. If you could take out two of them then that would be enough for me. Please go, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to you." I was just about ready to shove him away when he finally starts to move in the direction that I want him to go, sad defiance in his eyes.

"You will live with it whether you like it or not. Just be carefull Azaria." Jaran quickly moves back to me and hugs me tight.

I briefly hug him back, kissing him on the top of his head, and then put my angel necklace around his neck. "Stay safe. Go." As Jaran runs for cover he disappears from sight just as the Careers comes into view. At least our wolf friend was able to kill the one who shot Aster and injure two of the three Career Tributes.

Standing in the middle of the small clearing I have my staff casually at my side in a relaxed way yet ready for anything. Like Vincent I try to make myself seem like I wouldn't put up much of a fight, but it doesn't really work much. They already know I would do anything for Jaran. How can I even it out when there's three trained Tributes against one?

"Alone are you? Azaria, was it?" Said the one Tribute that seems to be the leader.

"Where's that little twig brother of yours?" Another one asks while the third one starts looking at the trees. Fear grips me for a moment when I think that one of them might be able to spot jaran's hiding place.

"He's in one of those trees, isn't he." The third one said, a cocky smile spreading across his face when my hard gaze shifts from their leader to him. Honestly I'm not sure myself how Jaran chose to hide, either he's in the clump of tall bushes or up in a tree. Either way, if any of them found where he was hiding he wouldn't stand a chance against them.

"it doesn't matter, Slyde. We're going to kill them today anyway." Their leader said. Satisfied with that answer all three of them started to advance on me.

"Now wait a moment. Why be hasty?" I said, stalling somewhat so that I could think of something. For a moment they stopped to listen, but I can see that they were impatient to kill me and Jaran.

"What do you want, 7?" The second Tribute demanded.

I wracked my brain for any kind of idea to get me on even ground with them and this was all I could think of. "Instead of all of you killing me off at once, how much more fun would it be for each of you to fight me one on one." At this point I was thinking myself crazy but it at least it gives them the appearance of having the advantage. Luckily their arrogance blinds their sense of rationality and instantly agree after I had explained to them that if the first one of them didn't kill me then there's the possibility of the other one finishing me off. I just hope that my skills with a staff is enough to get me through at least two of them so that Jaran could finish up the last one.

"How about you go first, Heath. You're always so impatient to kill someone." The Tribute boy named Slyde said to the second Tribute.

"Will do." Heath said as he stepped forward holding a large wicked-looking axe, eyeing my staff as it were a toothpick. It might as well be against a large axe that is much bigger than the one I was able to get at the Cornucopia. When he was ready he rushed at me, axe pulled back and ready to strike. I hold my ground until I'm sure of how he was going to swing that thing. When he's close enough to hit me he switches from a sideways attack for an overhead slash. Because the pole of the axe was kind of long I brought my staff up horizontally in a defensive position and just managed to stop the axe by inserting the thicker part of my staff just under the blade. There was a lot of force behind the attack and it nearly made my arms give in protest. Seeing that I'm stuck in my defensive position Heath starts to put more pressure on his axe, using almost all of weight to give him the added strength he needed. Then suddenly, before my arms could give from under all that pressure, I fall back into a roll and take Heath with me to the ground.

Not expecting what I had done Heath tumbled freely over me as I kicked him over my head. Getting up quick before he did I whirled around blindly with my staff in an attempt to at least hit him somewhere. I hit him in the head, the wood making a large smacking sound against Heath's head. Growling in anger as he held his hand to his head Heath lunged at me with his axe for a side slash. He was too close and knicked me on the arm, but because he put all his effort into that swing he left himself open for the sharp point of my staff to spear him through the heart. The sound of a cannon goes off just as his body hits the ground.

I don't have time however to take a breath when Slyde comes at me all of a sudden with a sword in hand. He was aiming for my face and I probably would have died if I hadn't stopped the sword by reflex with my staff. Withdrawing his sword he then started to slashed at me again from a different angles, trying to injure me in anyway he can. After several unsucessful blows he finally swipes at my tigh. It wasn't deep but it was long and it really hurt as I collapse onto my knee. That moment of distraction was all that Slyde needed to kill me, and he would've it it wasn't for the axe at his throat that Jaran had thrown. Another cannon explodes.

I was expecting him to still be hidden but I couldn't help to look around the clearing. Then I saw him standing several feet in front of the treeline and in plain sight. The last Career Tribute, the leader was obviously not happy and started running for Jaran. Pushing myself to my feet I somehow manage to tackle him to the ground, yelling for Jaran to run away. He did at first when he saw the leader coming for him, but I didn't know if he came back or not. Fighting down the pain in my arm and leg I try to hold down the male Tribute, but he was much stronger than me. Once he got a good hold on me he rolled us over so that he was sitting on my stomach, his weight forcing the air out of me, and wrapped his hands around my neck. Instinctively my hands grab onto his wrist in a futile effort to relieve the crushing grip on my neck.

Once again I actually thought I was going to die when all of a sudden the male Tribute jerks and cries out in pain. Coughing air back into my lungs I push him off of me and roll away from him. The knife that I gave Jaran was embedded deep into the Career Tribute's back. He then turned hatred fill eyes to Jaran, removing the knife from his back and holding it in the reverse palm hold he starts going for Jaran as he disappears back into the trees. Quickly finding my staff close by to me I grip it in my hands, take aim, and put everything I got as I threw my staff at the male Tribute sharp end first. In training I was okay but not that good at javalin throwing, but I was able to hit my mark as I had hoped. My self made staff impaled the Career Tribute entering to the back and out his front. He stood still for a moment and then fell to the ground.

The cannon explodes.

Sighing in relief I collapse on the blood soaked ground, placing my hand on one of my wounds but caring less about that as I scan the area. The last remaining Tributes are dead, laying before me where they were cut down. Once again, that's not what was on my mind.

"Jaran." I say tiredly. Nothing. I probably wasn't loud enough. "Jaran, it's safe now. It's just us." I say more loudly. Jaran immediately came out from his hiding place and ran to me, tear tracks already marking his face while more still came.

"Azaria!" He shouts as he throws himself at me instead of being gentle with my wounds. And despite the pain I am happy he did, I needed to feel him in my arms. Safe, alive, and strong. "Azaria, don't worry, you're going to be fine. We can heal you up." Jaran says. He knows what I plan to do and doesn't want it that way. He tries to to put his hands on my arm to cover a bloody slash but I move them away and catch them in mine.

"Jaran, I need you to do something for me. Please." I say to him. I know this might hurt him, even traumatize him, but I needed him to do it. And from the look on his face he already knew as he shook his head, but I ignored him. "Take his dagger and press it here." I press my palm over my heart. I stare at Jaran, holding his gaze, but he turns away as tears start pouring out of his eyes again. "Please Jaran. I hate it when I see you cry." I say, trying to get him to stop. I hug him to me again and he wraps his arms around my neck.

"I don't want to, Azaria. You're my big sister." He says.

"I know. That's why only you can do this." I pick up the dagger that I had pointed to earlier, the one that was hidden in Slyde's pocket, and hand it to Jaran. I half expected him to throw it away or hand it back to me, but he keeps it. Stares at it. Then finally, after a few moments, he slowly nods his head and looks up to me.

My heart nearly stops as his expression changed from sorrow to horror as he stares wide eyed behind me. Forcing myself to move I grab the dagger from Jaran's hands and whirl around to face our attacker. The leader Tribute that I thought was dead. Half of me felt relieved because he was aiming for me and half of me felt anger because he just won't die. He was somehow able to get the axe from Heath and I barely managed to block his axe with my dagger, earning myself a cut on my shoulder, yet somehow I hold it there. Shifting my weight slightly I try to kick at him. Unfortunately he sees what I was going to do and swiftly moves out of range, jumping back and preparing for another strike. For a few seconds we glare each other down. If my legs weren't straining to hold me up I would have charged him as he rushed me, but I held my ground as I looked for a good spot to end him.

"I love you, Jaran." I say loud enough for both to hear as I prepare myself for the final blow. Saving Jaran was going to be my gift to him, the least I could do was deliver the first fatal blow. When I was within swinging distance of his axe I stepped forward, faster than I had intended, with my dagger trained to his heart. Because I had moved closer to him the pole of the axe bruised my side. After that he could have pulled back, taken one good swing at me, if he was desperate enough, and I wouldn't have stopped him because before he could get to Jaran he would've been dead.

But that was the problem. His axe was stuck.

In someone else.


	8. HG Pt 3: Goodbye

Chapter 8

"I love you too, Zari." Jaran says weakly behind me.

As the Tribute before me takes his final breath and collapses in a dead heap I force myself to look back at my brother. Jaran had pushed me forward, out of the way from the blade of the axe. I don't know if he intended to get hit but... he didn't even look like he tried to brace himself or move away. The axe had dug deep into his stomach. With my eyes wide with shock and my mouth open to say something I could only stand there in horror as Jaran slowly looks up with me with a sad smile on his face. When he started to fall I found my voice and move to grab him.

"Jaran!" I instantly catch him before he reaches the ground and cradle him to me. "Jaran. Jaran, please stay with me. Jaran please..." I couldn't continue to say that. As much as I wanted my words to heal him, I knew that he wasn't long. Nonetheless I still begged him to stay awake. "Jaran. Let me take this axe out of you." I say. He nods weakly at me and clutches a fistful of my parka as I quickly pull the axe out. Jaran's attempt at not crying out in pain was futile, the sound stabbing my chest. "Jaran. Jaran, Why?" I sobbed. He was beginning to grow cold. I pull him closer to me, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, his body. I take off my own parka and wrap him in it when he starts to shiver.

"I'm... your brother... we protect... each other." He said. As he talked I could see the inside of his mouth was turning red with blood. Tears started to form in both our eyes. I could barely see him with my blurry vision so I angrily wipe my eyes, but the tears insist on coming. I could see it in his eyes and how his brows crease that he's trying to hide the pain while keeping his face as calm as he could. When did he become so strong? No. He's always been strong. That thought alone made my tears come faster.

How could this have happened? I did everything. Everything! I did whatever it took to protect him. Keep him safe. I did it all for him. I comforted him when our parents died. I kept him to me when the nights grew cold. I made his favorite foods whenever I could. I taught him how to climb trees and how to get down when he thought he was stuck. Taught him how to fight in case I was not around and he needed to defend himself. I held myself back from killing a rabbit because he wanted to keep it for a little while even though he knew we would have to eat it. I stood by him in the Reaping to become a Tribute so that he wouldn't have to go in alone. It was all for him, and the one time that I decide to do something for myself it is denied from me.

His breaths were starting to get shallow more wispy as he clung on to me. This whole time when I wanted to scold him for getting in the way I kept myself quiet as I cried over him, rocking him gently with my body, holding him more gently, and try to keep him warm.

"Zari." Jaran says, his voice even weaker.

"What is it Jaran?" I ask, my voice shaking. Jaran grasps at my shirt and tries to speak in my ear. I lean over him so that I could hear him better.

"Can you please do the song that mother sings with her hands?" I almost said no to him as he uses the same exact wording that he used when he was younger when our parents died. There was a lullaby that our mother would sing to us whenever she saw us looking sad or feeling low. As she sang the song she would also move her hands and arms as if telling a story. He knew I could never refuse him that, even like this.

I gently reposition him on my crossed lap so that his back was leaning against my body so that he could see my hands. "Do you think you can stay awake through the whole song? It's only short." I say, also saying the same words whenever he requested it late at night and he was about to fall asleep. Very slightly he nods his head and rests it on my neck.

My voice cracks a few times in the beginning as I hesitantly start to sing, but for him I put more effort into my voice so that he could hear me.

::I made the lyrics up to a beautiful instrumental song called "Letting Go" by Roy Todd if you wanted to maybe listen and read the lyrics along with it. I chose this song because when I listened to it the tempo throughout the whole song matches the pace of Azaria's voice as she sings so I thought it was perfect. Though originally the lullaby would be a bit faster of course. You can also use your imagination of the hands and arm movements::

When the moon falls down,

and the sun begins to shine,

you can hear the song of the birds,

As they sing through the trees,

The song is called the lullaby of the forest, oh can you hear its call

The song is called the lullaby of the forest, oh can you hear its call

When the moon wakes up,

and the sun starts to leave,

please listen to my voice

as the sun says goodbye

this song I sing is only for you as you close your eyes to sleep and dream

this song is my goodbye to you, please Jaran know that I always love you

la lala lala lala

na nanana na nana

The last part, instead of repeating its first line, I decided to make it my own. Because I was sure that if I just said it to him he probably would not live long enough to hear it one last time.

"I love you... Zari. I... Always... Have." Jaran said, the light of his eyes starting to fade.

"I love you too, Jaran. Say hi to mom.. and dad.. for me." He was gone. He's gone now. My breath starts hitching into violent sobs as I hug his still form to me. The pain in my chest so deep and great I'm sure that my sobbing is the only thing keeping me alive. Leaning over his body I close his eyes with my hands as I start to slightly rock back and forth in an attempt to hold back my pain.

"It was supposed to be me!" I shout suddenly as I throw my head back and yell at the sky, tears now flowing freely down my face. "It was supposed to be me! I was to die! Not him! It was never supposed to be him! No." I lean back over Jaran, my warm forehead connecting with his now cold one. "Jaran. Why? Why did you have to do that? Jaran. Jaran... Jar... an."

I was too grieved, too heartbroken over Jaran's death to notice that someone had come down from an airship and injected something into me to put me to sleep. I fell into a dreamless sleep as I continued to call Jaran's name until I could no longer talk.

When I finally woke up I feel as if I've slept for ages. I did not open my eyes at first so that I could listen to my surroundings, but when I don't hear anything, even bird song, my eyes snap open and I try to sit up. The only thing is I'm strapped to a bed and I'm in a windowless and seemingly doorless room. For a moment I'm confused because I thought I was still in the arena when I woke up. But then the memories of the last thing I remembered before I was put to sleep comes to my mind so suddenly, and with so much force, that my tears were already rolling down my face before I realized why I was crying.

Jaran is dead.

The pain came back so strongly I felt like I couldn't breathe. He saved me. He saved me and died. He didn't even give me a chance to try and get myself killed for him. Jaran. My little brother. The one I fought to protect all my life. I will never see him again. I'll never see his smiling face again. I'll never hear him call me Zari again. I'll never feel his arms around my waist when I hug him back and kiss him on top of his head. Within the room all I can hear now is my loud cries. The agony of Jaran's death so sharp all I want to do is curl up into a ball, but even that I am not allowed to do because of the strap that holds me to my bed. So the only thing I could do was lie on my back and cry into my hands until I am somehow put to sleep again when I ignored an avox that had brought me some food.

Apparently they wouldn't let me starve to death so they started to force feed me and then immediately putting me back to sleep before I could start thrashing in my sorrow again. Even sleeping didn't help. I had dreams of Jaran dying in my arms all over again. I would try to do things differently in each dream, but the end was always the same. After several times of waking up, being fed, and then being put to sleep again I started to calm down with my physical mourning fits. Whenever I woke I would just lie still and stare at the ceiling, ignoring everything and anyone. I knew I couldn't go on like this since I would have to show up for the Victor's interview in a few days, but... How could I face the people that killed Jaran? Killed me. Even though I know I am alive physically I felt my spirit break the moment Jaran left me.

When the time came that I was allowed to leave I dress in my black thermal shirt and the pants that I used in the arena and met with everyone. My mind was so numb that I barely realize what was going on around me. I must have looked terrible because even Tobias was uncharacteristically quiet, but that didn't stop him from hugging me first. Several days ago I probably would've allowed him to hug me for a few moments and then start pulling away, but I didn't. That one hug brought me back to tears as I cling to Tobias, sobs shaking my body so badly that Vincent had to pry me from my dog-like escort and sit me down for a while. As I continued to cry some more against Vincent he slips my angel necklace back onto my neck and they all waited for me to finally calm down.

"Okay, Azaria, that's enough for now. Come on, you still got an interview to go to." Vincent says as he gently moves me off him. "Look, I know you're still in pain over all this, but do you think you can pull yourself together long enough to do the interview?"

It takes me a few moments to answer him but I finally nod my head, feeling a little dizzy with the slight movement because of crying too much. Vincent gives me a sad smile and gently wipes my tears away. "Thanks." I say in a somewhat hoarse voice.

"Come on sweetling, let's get you cleaned up." Aylin says as she wraps an arm around my shoulder and leads me away from everyone. While we walk Rune moves from Aylin's head, down her arm, and onto my shoulder. As he settles himself at the crook of my neck I notice that he's dyed black this time.

The whole time that I am being worked on I stand silently staring at the ground before me yet obediently move however I am asked, whether it was a tilt of the head or a lift of my arm. In order to not think about what happened in the arena I try to focus on the conversations of my prep team, but unfortunately they're talking about some of the things they remembered seeing in the games. Nearly coming into tears again I then try to pay extra attention to what they're doing. Once they were done Aylin came in with my dress. Silently she helps me put it on and then shows me to the mirror.

As I stare at the dress I couldn't help but find something familiar about it. It was a simple mermaid styled dress that looked like it had black feathers that shimmered a dark blue when I moved around, like the iridescent feathers of a pigeon. The sleeves of the dress drapes over my shoulder and flares into a different kind of shape that I was not expecting from Aylin, looking almost in the shape of a different kind of wings. My face, for the most part, was left alone except for the small light blue and white sparkles that surround my eye, making me look like I am crying diamonds. My hair was also left alone as they did a simple part on the side and brought small groups of hair forward to frame my sad face.

"When I was making this dress for you I thought back to when you were talking to Jaran about him giving Caesar the carving of his favorite bird." Aylin said as she hugged me from behind in a motherly way. "The black and blue feathers of the swallow, I thought, would be perfect for your mood this evening since you're still in mourning for your brother."

"Thank you, Aylin." I say in almost a whisper. "I really appreciate all you've done." Even as I say those few words of gratitude my face is still set in a dazed look. Aylin nodded in understanding and took me to the victor's interview with Caesar.

In the interview while Caesar was asking questions or trying to make jokes I did nothing but stare aimlessly at the space behind Caesar and answering his questions with simple and quick responses. Good-naturedly he tried to lighten the depressing mood that I had set but I couldn't find any reason to smile. Not happily, at least. Eventually he gave up and asked me, as his last question, something that involved Jaran. All of his questions since the beginning had carefully been asked in a way that I wouldn't have to think about Jaran and start crying at the thought of him, until now. And his question was probably the worst thing he could've asked me even though I can see he is genuinely sorry for my loss.

He asked me what I had planned to do now that Jaran was gone. Even I didn't know. All my life all I've ever done was care for no one but for Jaran and myself. It was the only thing that filled my days and I can't think of anything else that I could do. Just the thought of living without my brother brought me to tears again after trying so hard not to cry again. Hesitantly I answered him that I didn't know what I would do while my tears came down slowly one by one. I could hear sounds of sympathy from the crowd followed by faint sounds of surprise. Feeling a little curious I look up into a screen that was focused on me and saw that instead if clear drops of tears there were shining sparkles lining my face. I wonder if this was Aylin's way of showing how sad I was.

Breathing deep so as to control myself we then both settled into our seats to watch the reviewing of the games. Because I'm the victor they put in more clips of me, Jaran, and Aster. As we watched the video I was then able to see what Aster had been doing behind our backs. When me and Jaran were collecting branches she was able to sneak away long enough to talk with a Career Tribute and then come back within my sight range before I noticed she was gone. When she left us early in the morning on our second day in the games. When she hid the warning message from Vincent when he sent me and Jaran the antidotes. When she climbed down from the tree that we were sleeping in before the wolf came and waited at its base. She was also the reason why we never really bumped into any Careers. They had promised her that they would not come after us if she spied on me. Too frightened to die Aster would give them a shaky nod and then come running back to us as if she really was busy with other things.

Another thing that I noticed while watching the clips of my group was how different Jaran looked while in the arena. Because I was too busy trying to keep Jaran and Aster safe I never noticed how grown up Jaran seemed. I found myself asking the same question I had asked myself before when Jaran was dying in my arms. When did he become so strong? And then I answered the same way. He's always been strong. And then the worst part came when I had to watch the death of my brother. Surrounded by the dead Tributes I watch myself cry over Jaran. Beg him not to leave me. And sing to him, while doing the hand and arm movements, our favorite lullaby until he dies.

When the recap of the videos were finally over I was so ready to get away from all these sadistic Capitol people that I probably would've run away if Caesar hadn't said that he had something for me. After I was relaxed back down into my seat Caesar took out something wrapped in a pure white cloth. When he unwrapped it I saw the newly colored carving of the bird in flight that Jaran had given him. The carving of the swallow had been expertly painted so that it looked like the actual bird. Caesar told me that if Jaran had been able to make it through the games with my sacrifice then he would've given it back to him, but since it was me that survived he gave it to me instead as a reminder of my brother. If I wasn't so dazed with sadness I probably would've reacted angrily and slap the thing out of his hands. Instead I had gingerly took it, holding it to me and left without a word, not bothering to stay for Caesar's closing comments.

Once I was off the stage I was met immediately with Aylin followed by the others. Since I didn't need to go back to my room for anything I hugged Aylin and Mikeg goodbye and left with Vincent and Tobias to the train station. No words were said between either of us, both men respectfully giving me time to myself. When we were on the train going back to District 7 I didn't go to my room immediately, knowing that Tobias will still call me for dinner later on anyway, but laid down on the couch instead. No one disturbed me the whole time while I stared at the leather material of the couch, my mind wandering back to the games, to Jaran, over and over again no matter how much I didn't want to. The train was too quiet so there was nothing that could give me the smallest distraction. Not even Jaran's swallow carving distracted me from the pain of it all.

Eventually, as I had thought, Tobias came to me only once to tell me that it was time to eat dinner. He only hovered for a moment to see if I would get up but then left me alone. After about fifteen minutes of hearing the soft clinking sounds of eating utensils on glass plates I decided to get up and eat before Vincent thinks of saying anything. I didn't feel really hungry, even though I didn't really eat anything at all today, so I just put a few things on my plate, enough so that neither Vincent nor Tobias would fuss about me eating more. After I'm doing eating I was about to leave for my room when Vincent stopped me.

"There's something that you need to see." Vincent says.

"I'm not watching the the replay of the interview today." I say, thinking that's what Vincent was talking about. He shakes his head and looks to Tobias. Both of them get up from the table and head for the couches, waiting for me to join them before they turned on the screen. Feeling like I wasn't going to get out of this I seat myself in between them, looking at them with a slightly annoyed expression that seemed to say 'happy now?' When the screen turned on I was totally unprepared for what I saw as I gasp in surprise at the sight of Jaran. He looked uncertain but also wanting to say something as he shifted in his seat. He was wearing the outfit he wore when Vincent and Tobias were helping us get ready for our interview with Caesar. After a few moments of staring at the carpet Jaran finally looked at the camera. At me.

"Zari... Azaria." He paused for a moment. "You seeing this video means that I've done what I wanted to do. And I'm not sorry for what I did whatever it was. All I know is that you're alive and I'm gone. I know that you should be in pain right now and I really wish you wouldn't be. You have done so many things for me, Zari, but you wouldn't let me do anything for you. So this is my way of repaying you." Jaran went silent before he started talking again. "Now that you're the victor you will be on your way back to our home... your home, in that nice house that they have for the victors. I want you to live there. I want you to move on and find something else to do, because knowing you you'll probably sit around because I'm not around to be taken care of anymore." His eyes became a little distant as he thought of something and a little smile appeared on his face. "You know how we were wondering why the Carltons gave you that angel necklace? I think I just figured out what it really means now. All I can say is the girl is you." Jaran's face then became a little serious again. It was really kind of odd to see him like that because whenever I saw Jaran he was always smiling and always making me laugh. "If you're wondering when I first started thinking about letting you win the games it began when we slept in separate rooms for the first time on our first night here at the Capitol. I knew without a doubt you would do anything to make sure I lived and then what after that, Zari? You know me well enough that I can't live on my own because of how I am. That night when I didn't go to bed and said I forgot to ask Vincent something I wanted to ask him to help me figure out a way to make sure you win." I then instantly snapped my head around to looked at Vincent who was avoiding eye contact with me and staring intently at the screen. "Please don't blame him. He wasn't the only one." I looked away from the screen again and looked to Tobias in disbelief. Even he was in it too? All of them? When they knew full well my intentions? "Everyone of course knew that you would die before I would and tried to make me reconsider what I was planning on doing, knowing that this would hurt you, but I didn't listen to them and pressed them to help me." I could see that Jaran's eyes were beginning to glisten. "Just thinking about it I already miss you, Zari, and I know that right now you're missing me too. But I know that you're strong." Just Tobais then we hear Tobias's distant voice in the background telling us to hurry up.

"Wrap it up, Jaran, before your sister sees this." Vincent's voice said from behind the camera. Jaran looks to where probably Tobais was and then looks back at the camera as he starts to wipe his eyes.

"As you heard, I got to go, Zari, or else you'll catch me. I love you, sis. And I'll give mom and dad your love too." Jaran gives a big unconvincingly happy smile. "Goodbye, Zari." Then the screen turns black just as we hear Aylin making some kind of comment about whatever.

The room was silent once again, the room looking even more darker to me than before. I could feel the eyes of my mentor and district escort on me as I stare longingly at the screen, wanting to see Jaran again and hear his voice. Not wanting to cry in front of people again, even though it's just Vincent and Tobais, I say goodnight to the two and leave for my room in a hurry. I had forgotten that I still had Aylin's dress on so before I went to bed I took it off, laying it out a chair, and went to sleep with a simple nightgown on. Even though I was tired my eyes weren't. My mind was too restless as I thought about the video that Jaran made, but I try not to think about it. Opening my eyes in the dark I look out my window to see the dark shapes of the trees moving past in a blur, the light of the half moon pooling into my room and nearly touching my bed. As I continue to stare out the window I unconsciously start to play with my angel necklace. Feeling the small indents that detailed the long feathers of the wings I remembered how I had put the necklace on Jaran, hoping that it would protect him like how Ariana hoped it would for me. But it didn't. Rolling over so that my face was mostly in the pillow I then started to cry myself to sleep, feeling so alone for the first time in my life and knowing that I will probably feel like this from now on. My last thoughts before I was finally able to fall asleep was at least Jaran was with mom and dad.

The next morning Tobias knocks on my door in a melodious rhythm that startles me from my sleep and then opens the door as he skips in and hops on my bed next to me. "Come come, miss Azaria. It is time to get up. You are almost home now my dear." He says as he makes a pawing motion with his hands on my shoulder. Rolling over sleepily with slightly puffy eyes I stare at him as if he's crazy, which he pretty much is, and notice that for the first time he isn't wearing any make up. He still wore his regular golden jacket lined with fur and dog ears on the hood but without his usual facial stuff on I can see that he's naturally tan and looks a bit younger than I thought, probably about mid twenties with Vincent. But despite him acting as if nothing had happened I can see in his golden eyes that he was almost as sad as me.

"I'm guessing you've never really cheered anybody up before haven't you, Tobias." I say with a small sad smile. Letting his cheery facade fall Tobais shakes his head. "And I bet you've never had someone you love die right in front of you either." Again Tobais shakes his head, breaking eye contact with me and staring at the floor. I didn't mean for him to feel bad about what he was doing, I appreciated his effort in trying to cheer me up but I kind of just wanted him to know that it wasn't working with the way he was acting. "You need to understand that I just lost my only family. It, it's going to take a while, but thank you for trying." I say as I sit up. Before I could get out of the bed Tobias gives me another comforting hug.

"I just don't like seeing anybody looking so sad." Tobias said. "Promise me you'll smile again okay, Zari?" At the sound of my pet name coming from someone else I pull back to look at Tobias and for a second Jaran's face flashes before my eyes.

Turning my head so that Tobias couldn't see my moistening eyes I then get up and start looking for something to wear. "Maybe." I say.

"Don't take too long. We'll be pulling into District 7 soon." He says and closes the door as he leaves.

When the train finally pulls into the station I do not look up at the people of District 7, even when the doors slide open. I had already said my last goodbye to Tobias so there was no more reason to keep my head up. With my watery eyes downcast I follow Vincent off the train and stay about a step behind him as we make our way through the crowd. The people were somewhat quiet for the most part, patting my shoulders and back sympathetically as I pass with an occasional comment, but I was too out of it to hear anything else. I'm sure the people are happy to have another victor anyway. Ignoring the crowd I absentmindedly start to walk to where me and Jaran's old house is, not caring if Vincent was aware that I was not behind him. I just wanted to go home. But he did notice and tried to lead me to the Victor's Village.

"Just leave me alone." I say as I shrug off his hand. I didn't mean to be rude to the one person that managed to keep me and Jaran alive the longest but I really just needed to be alone. When he insisted and said something about rain I then broke into a run, weaving around around some buildings and homes for good measure before I made my way to the edge of District 7. By the time I reached our, my, old small home I was already panting and collapsed on a small chair that father had made for Jaran when he was little. Jaran. It was probably a bad idea to come here where so many wonderful memories were left behind now coming back in painful flashbacks that hurt my head and stung my chest. Moving off the chair I made my way to the bed that me and Jaran used to share and just laid there for hours, making myself cry for everything that I lost. I cried until I was too sleepy to cry and welcomed sleep.

When I woke up the sky was almost dark as the day came to a close. Looking around the room of my house it felt too big now that it's just me in it. And no Jaran to liven it up. Resisting an urge to go into another weeping fit I sluggishly pulled myself out of bed and opened a drawer to look for some matches. I couldn't stay in this house any longer. I didn't want to. I wouldn't be able to take living alone in a place where I used to have a family, where everything reminded me of them and make the pain even worse. Once I found the small box of matches that me and Jaran saved only for the coldest of nights I took one more look around. I remembered how on the train I looked back at this small house, thinking I wouldn't see it again missing the memories were were leaving behind. Now I just didn't want to look at it anymore. With some reluctance I lit the last match with one swipe and let it fall into the opened drawer from where I had gotten it from. Because it was dry wood it didn't take much for a small fire to start spreading. First the whole drawer then to the wooden walls of the house. Watching the flames grow from the corner of my eye I walk out of my house and stop at a good enough distance away as I watch my former home burn. Sitting down on my spot I bring my knees up to my chest and place my chin on my arm as I hug my legs.

Before the house was totally consumed in the fire it then started to rain. So that's what Vincent was talking about, I think. But I don't move. The rain wasn't heavy yet, just sprinkling, so the fire was still able to burn until the house started to creak in readiness to collapse on itself. As I had thought the smoke from the fire and rain brought some unwanted attention from some people. I guess they would've put out the fire if it wasn't for the rain, thinking that the it will just die down when the rain gets heavier. Several minutes after the people had left I vaguely remember the Carltons trying to move me from my spot, trying to get my attention in any way that the could. Both Mrs. Carlton and Ariana pleaded with me to get up and come with them until Mr. Carlton picked me up himself, but I just struggled until he let me go and resumed by position on the ground as I stared blankly at my home. The flames had already reached the roof by now, the blaze slightly warming me up from the rain's chill. Seeing that I would refuse to leave the Carltons left and came back with food and drink and left me alone again after another attempt at trying to get me to leave with them, but I just ignored their pleas. I know they mean well, but... I just couldn't move. I didn't want to.

They probably told Vincent about what I was doing because I heard his heavy footsteps coming my way and stopping right behind me. I could feel his disappointed gaze boring into my still body, silently commanding me to stand up, but I wouldn't budge. He said something to me in a calm firm voice that I probably couldn't hear because of the rain or maybe because I was blocking him. Like Mr. Carlton, but with a little more force, Vincent tried to pick me up by my arm but I just jerked myself free from his grip on me and shook my head in my arms. I needed the cold of the rain to numb me when my mind could not. Or maybe I just felt like punishing myself in some way. Honestly even I didn't know what I'm doing. After about several minutes of hearing Vincent trying to talk some sense into me and me not really listening to what he was saying Vincent finally left me alone, as I had asked him to earlier today.

After an hour the rain already felt like a shower, soaking me to the bone, and whatever was left of my old home was blackened and burned to the ground. About thirty minutes ago I heard someone else coming my way, but unlike my other visitors they stayed several feet away from me. Whoever they were they just waited there, not talking or moving, from what I could hear. They were just there. Having a feeling that they had no intention of disturbing me I continued with my odd way of mourning for Jaran and not even bothering to turn around to see who it was that was watching me.

With cold fingers I take out the angel necklace from my wet shirt and stare at it. Turning it over this way and that I think again now I had foolishly placed my hopes on it to keep Jaran safe. Angrily I break the string from my neck, throwing the angel pendant away from me, and then began to cry once more as I hugged my legs even tighter to me. How many times did I cry today, I wondered. How many yesterday? Too many times and too much for my liking, but I couldn't help it. For me to cry this much, it really isn't like me. I don't cry, I barely do, but here I am looking and feeling like an emotional wreck. And it's all because of the Capitol and their stupid Games.

I cried for what seemed like forever until I felt like I was totally drained of tears. The pain throbbing in my head told me that I was now getting a fever from being very wet and cold. Feeling hurt and really tired my eye lids began to feel heavy as my body started to sway a little. I tried to keep myself awake but then lost the struggle between conscious and unconsciousness as my head sunk deeper onto my arms. As my eyes start to close on their own I take one last look at my old home. "Goodbye, Jaran." I say under my breath before I black out. My body must have relaxed itself onto the ground because I was later barely aware of someone gently picking me up and carrying me away. To where I didn't know because that's when I fell back to sleep.


	9. Moving on

Chapter 9

The next morning I am woken up by the rays of the late morning sun hitting my eyes. Not only that but now that I'm conscious I am sharply aware of a splitting headache. Groaning a bit from the pain, a little glad for the distraction from the pain in my chest, I try to sit up. Once I'm in a sitting position I had to take deep breaths and close my eyes because when I tried to look around the room everything just made me dizzy. Holding my hands onto both sides of my head I slowly open my eyes and move my head a little more cautiously. On a little table next to me I see that there are three things on it. A glass of water, the painted swallow carving that Jaran made, and my angel necklace with the detached wings next to the girl. The room I'm in is just a little bit smaller than my whole one-room house with plain white walls, the window next to my bed, a brown dresser next to the door, and a sleeping Vincent sitting on a large chair on the opposite corner next to me where I didn't see him at first. Just as I was about to get up someone opens the door and comes in with a tray of food. It was that other guy that visited me and Jaran at the Justice Building when we weren't expecting anyone else.

"Morning. It's good to see you're finally awake." He says, his face brightening a bit as he walks over to me and sets the tray on the edge of the table where I could easily reach. "You've been asleep with a bad fever for two days. You even got Vincent worried a bit." We both look at the sleeping person in the corner, his normal bed hair looking even more messed up than usual. Wait, did he say two days? "I guess since you're up you should be feeling a little better. But you still have a fever." The guy said as he put three fingers on my forehead. When I didn't say anything he removed his hand and sat at the foot of the bed, looking around the room somewhat awkwardly. Obviously with the way that I am feeling I'm not in a talkative mood as I quietly watched him talk. I kind of wonder when he might figure out that I forgot his name. I really did just officially meet him once.

"Where am I?" I ask softly as I lean my back against the bed's headboard.

"You're in your new home in the victor's village. Vincent lives right next to you." He answers. I take a few moments to think before I ask another question.

"How did I get here? Where are the Carltons? And why are you even here?" Once again rude, but I don't care at the moment.

The guy seemed to hesitate for a moment. "The night that you burned down your house I was the one waiting behind you until you blacked out and then carried you home. Vincent saw me coming and asked me to help him take care of you since I seemed to be one of the few people who cares about what happened to you. The Carltons have been coming to check on you everyday, so they should be here around lunch time." Nodding once I look out the window. So he came to visit me and Jaran and then he waits for me to fall asleep in the rain to carry me back home. This guy just pops up at odd times.

"What does your family think of you coming here?" I ask.

"They don't mind me going off to help a friend who's going through the same pain I did." He said, shrugging his shoulders a bit.

"It's different. You didn't have to hold your brother and watch him die in your arms." I say with a little edge in my voice. Why am I being mad all of a sudden?

"But you didn't have to watch him fight for his life. You, at least, were able to protect him til the end." He said.

All of a sudden my anger subsided. "I didn't protect him." Sadly I look at the swallow carving on the table. "He protected me." Just as new tears were starting to roll down my face my head started hurting again. Groaning I lay back down and cover myself with the blanket

"Azaria, I know you're still not feeling well but you need to eat." Said a sleepy Vincent. "Or I'll have either Gabriel or Mrs. Carlton make you eat."

"Why do you guys even care!?" I shout through the covers. "You all didn't before, why are you starting now?" I was really crying now with my anger return once again for no reason. I was half expecting Vincent to make some kind of sharp reply or say something clever in that wise kind of way that he always talks. Instead he lets out a somewhat frustrated sigh and told the guy, Gabriel, to leave me be for a while. As soon as both guys are out and the door closed I angrily throw an extra pillow in a random direction, earning me a sharp jolt of pain going through my head which just makes me feel even more miserable. Sprawled on my back I clutch my head as I try to calm myself down and breathe, but every time I tried to think of something my thoughts would immediately go back to Jaran and then I would just get frustrated again. I feel so confused and hurt.

What is wrong with me? I've never felt so... sad. Angry. Upset. Miserable. Even when our parents died I never felt like this. Not this bad. I can't think straight. Jaran, why did you have to go and take that blow for me? I should've been faster, just a little more stronger. Maybe if I had seen the signs earlier or would have been more forceful on Jaran to stay away he probably would still be alive right now. He could bounce back better than me and would most likely be able to get over my death faster. At the rate I'm going I feel like I'm falling deeper instead of getting back up. 'You will live with it whether you like it or not.' That was what Jaran had said when I sent him off to hide. I didn't know what it meant at the time or why he even said that. But now I know that he was giving me a hint, somewhat, that I was going to be the victor and not him, despite my efforts. Just... why? Why?! Why would he not want to stay alive? Even without me he would have it easier than when were living by ourselves.

Feeling my headache start to go away I roll onto my side and stare at the wall. I must have dozed off though because I find myself waking up back under the blanket again. It was still bright outside so I was probably out for about an hour. I was in a more comortable position on my side so I was able to see my food next to my few belongings were still on the small table and that Gabriel was sitting on the armchair observing the swallow carving. He then looked up, the action seemingly habitual because he looked a bit surprised to find me staring back at him after a few seconds of him trying to figure out that I was awake.

"Hey. I'm sorry for saying anything that might have..." Gabriel trailed off in his sentence, lost for words. "Well, I didn't mean for you to feel worse about what happened." He got up and put the swallow back where he got it. "The Carltons arrived several minutes ago. Would you like me to go get them for you?" I didn't trust myself to answer him, afraid that I might suddenly become angry with him again or something. Without even a nod I just stared up at him until he decided on his own to go and tell the family that I was awake.

Soon after Gabriel left Mrs. Carlton came in knocking on the door as the rest of her family came in one by one. "Welcome back, Azaria. How are you feeling?" Like with Gabriel I didn't answer them, but they might of took my looking away as a negative sign. I've got to say, it is kind of odd being visited so many times by others when I'm so used to being on my own and nobody cared for me and Jaran. I don't blame anybody in District 7 for not even stopping by. They too were busy trying to take care of their own families, the Carltons being no exception. I saw that Ariana had noticed the necklace she had given me on the table but she didn't touch it and just smiled sadly at me, trying to be comforting yet not knowing what else to do.

The Carltons spent all afternoon talking with me, even though I wouldn't say anything. They told me some stories about their lives, sometimes even adding in a funny memory here and there. Listening to them would sometimes put tears back into my eyes, making me hide behind the blanket, and sometimes it would, if I was in my right mind, make me laugh, but only on the inside. Vincent and Gabriel eventually back came in to join us, the latter having to push in the sleepy one through the door and then bringing in a few chairs for the adults to sit on while Ariana sat at my feet and Gabriel in front of me on the floor. At least the room was big enough to occupy all of us with just a little extra room at the back. As everyone talked with one another I found myself absentmindedly playing with Gabriel's loose hair because it kind of looked like Jaran's hairstyle. When he turned around I was looking at Jaran, a small smile on his face as if nothing had happened.

"Azaria? It's me, Gabriel. I'm not Jaran. Are you okay?" Gabriel asked me. For a moment I was so happy to see Jaran right in front of me, alive and not dead. But then his face was suddenly replaced by Gabriel's concerned one. Quickly withdrawing my hand from his hair I bury my face into my pillow and mumbled an apology. Even behind my closed eyes I can still see Jaran's face smiling at me in my mind. "She thought I was Jaran. Her eyes weren't really focused on me." I heard him say to the others. The Carltons took it as a sign to leave. Ariana gave me a hug, telling me that she and her family were going to come back tomorrow, then her mom kissed me goodbye at the side of my head, and Mr. Carlton gave me an affectionate rub on the back. From what I can hear Vincent walked the family out the door and then came back to the room.

"You should probably go home. Your parents might worry about you." Vincent says, I guess, to Gabriel since he couldn't be talking to me. "I'm going to go on home and then come back later to make sure Azaria at least eats something for the day. She might not being going to sleep any time soon but I think she might want some time alone." For a second I feel a little sad at the thought of being left alone. But then what else would anyone do here with someone who is emotionally unstable and seeing someone else's face on another's? Nothing. It probably would be better if they both just left. Sighing sadly to myself I turn to my other side, my back facing the two men as I faced the wall, and waited for them to leave me to myself and to my thoughts.

"It's okay, Vince. I think I'll stay here for a while." Gabriel says from where he was on the ground. With nothing else being said I heard Vincent's footsteps and then the closing of the door. After a few moments of silence I hear Gabriel shift a little and I get a strange sense that he's watching me. "I guess you're wondering why I decided to stay." He said as more of a statement than a question. I could care less if he answered my unspoken question or not so I just shrug my shoulders. "I just thought you might need some company. I believe that no one should be alone when they're grieving, even if they may want to be alone. May I sit here?" Turning my head slightly I see that he's indicating to the spot where Ariana was sitting at the foot of the bed. I shrug my shoulders again and then he settles himself down with his back on the wall. "Like you I was close with my little brother. When he was chosen for the reaping I didn't know why I didn't volunteer for him. I had plenty of time as I watched him walk up to the stage. It was hard for my family to watch the Games, but we couldn't help but want to know what would become of him. When he died from an ambush from another Tribute I was the one who took it the hardest, but I was able to have the support of my parents and older brother. I don't know what would've happened to me if it wasn't for them being there for me. But you just lost your whole family."

I know he didn't mean to sound so blunt about it but I couldn't help the sting in my eyes. I stayed still, however, just so he wouldn't know how he affected me with that small sentance and he continued talking. "I know that I will never understand the pain you're going through right now, having to loose everyone you've loved. But you just saw today that there are people here that care for you." I wanted to make some kind of retort, to tell him again that no one cared for me and Jaran before the Hunger Games and that it was just their own guilt driving them to be kinder. "I can see you're tring to hide that you're mad. You don't have to hide what you're feeling-" Without thinking I kick his leg. What the heck was I trying to accoplish by doing that? Shut him up? Not likely, but for some reason I wanted to do it again. Using my my other foot I kick him again on a different spot of his leg. Why isn't he pulling back? Taking a peek at him I see that he's staring straight ahead, looking at the door, and not saying anything.

"What's you're problem? Why didn't you say anything when I kicked you again?" I snapped at him, ignoring the pain in my head from my fever as I sat up to look at him better. "When someone hurts you you're supposed to show them how much they hurt you and tell them to stop." Without knowing it I was saying an old argument that I had with Jaran one time when he was being bullied. And I felt like I was seeing him again. Jaran sitting in front of me with a dark buise on his arm. But just like before Gabriel's voice takes away the illusion of my brother that my mind had created.

"That's what I'm doing for you. Except I'm not telling you to stop. You can let out your emotions however you feel like it. If you're angry and want to hit me, go ahead." Gabriel said, not moving away but shifting himself so that he would be more easier to hit. Growling to myself I flung myself back down onto my pillow as I start to cry in frustration. I feel so ridiculous, getting mad over nothing when he was just trying to help. Taking a quick glance over the blanket I see that he's still looking sadly at me. Sighing I put my head under my blanket, curl up into a ball, and stay quiet for the rest of the day until it was time to sleep. Even then Gabriel didn't leave me. He was just there.

Over the next several days pretty much the same things just happened routinely. Starting on the second day, however, after waking up from my two day fever sleep some people in the District started coming to give their respects for Jaran and to give me gifts of condolences, whether it was food or things that they believed I might need in my life. Despite my somewhat bitter attitude and aloof appearance I feel kind of touched yet kind of embarrassed at their want to show how sorry they were. The Carltons would come over every time around noon to check on me, sharing whatever food they could spare and trying to cheer me up however they can while being respectful and understanding of my feelings. Vincent came a little more often to see how I was getting along with everyone else and would sometimes be the person between me and another if it looks like I was being too emotional. Yet, for some reason, I can't help but wonder every time why is it that I see Gabriel the most out of all of them. Every morning he's already there to offer any assistance if I needed any and he's the last one I see before I fall asleep. Sometimes I wonder if he ever goes home but then I notice that every day he wears a different shirt. Every time I ask him the same question why he keeps coming back and not staying with his family he always answers the same things. He keeps saying that it's what friends do, I don't have to be alone when everyone else is gone and have no one to talk to when I feel like talking, he doesn't mind coming to help me, and a lot of other excuses that don't seem to match his efforts.

"Azaria, since you've finally recovered from your fever would you like to have dinner with us tonight?" Mrs. Carlton offered one day when I was stretching out my body after laying in it for what felt like forever because of my fever. Even though I could feel that it had gone down a lot since the rains Gabriel wouldn't let me even walk around my own home, except to go to the bathroom, until my fever had completely gone down. When it finally did I was kind of hoping that I would stop seeing Jaran's face on almost everyone I looked at or that I would stop feeling as if I just saw him at the corner of my eye when it was just Vincent, any of the Carltons, or Gabriel.

"You don't have to if you don't want to, but it would nice if you could." Ariana encouraged me. She was pleading to me in kind of the same way that Jaran always would when he wanted something but was willing to show that he would accept my answer if I said no.

I really didn't know what to say. I didn't really feel like going anywhere but at the same time I really felt like going somewhere because I was so restless. And I've never even been invited to someone's home for dinner before so it made me feel a little shy to accept. "I don't know." I answered. "Maybe."

Even though it wasn't exactly the kind of answer that Mrs. Carlton and Ariana were hoping for they both smiled at me hopefully. "Well, if you decide that you would like to join us I'm sure either Vincent or Gabriel could bring you over if you're ready." Mrs. Carlton said as she stood up from her chair and tapped to her daughter and husband that it was time to leave. As I watched them leave I felt myself make up my mind, but I held myself from following them or calling out to them. I was still kind of unsure whether I wanted to go or not but I also didn't want to disappoint them.

Deciding that I was going to make up my mind later I got off my bed, ignoring Vincent's questioning stare, and walked out of my room. Since coming back to District 7 this is the first time that I've actually explored my new home. As I walk down the hallway I casually open every door I see and find that each of the five other rooms that I found look just like my own. Except for one room next to mines that looked lived in. Curious I looked in and figured out that it was Gabriel's room because his belongings were not hid well enough under the bed. Well, it explains why he's always here every morning. He never leaves. Shaking my head I sigh, closing the door, and move on. The last room that I found upstairs was a kind of office that was made a litle bigger than the other rooms that had a desk, a telephone, a long couch, and a shelf with some books on it. Done with the upstairs part of the house I then move down to find that there is a large kitchen, obviously having been used a lot lately judging by the accumulated mess, a living room with comfy looking sofas, and even a basement that was clean and bare.

I may not be used to living in a large house but I know shouldn't be tired after having just walked around a little. Taking deep breaths I sink down into one of the sofas in the living room and wait until I catch my breath. To be this tired I must really be out of shape, of course, after not having walked much in days and then feeling the heaviness of Jaran's death. As I continue to look around the room with my eyes I can think of only one good thing about living in this kind of house. Lack of memories. Because this place is all new to me there is nothing here that would remind me of Jaran, and just thinking about going back out and seeing all the places that I've been with him I don't know how I'm going to take all that in. I have a hard enough time thinking that I might see Jaran running around here, how much worse when I'm standing in the place where we used to go?

"So what do you plan on doing tonight? Will you see the Carltons or will you just stay home?" Vincent asked. I did not notice that he was already standing next to me. "The choice is all yours, I just want to know what you're going to do."

It took me a few moments to consider my options. "I guess I'll go see them. I feel so weak and I shouldn't keep staying at home."

"If that's going to be your only reason for going then you might as well stay. Don't think you need to visit them just because you feel like you're not up to your old self. If you still need time to heal give yourself that time. Don't force yourself to move on just because you don't want to disappoint someone." Vincent said, looking once again like the mentor that I knew at the Capitol. Since coming back home Vincent started to act a little differently, but that was probably just because I never really knew him before I had to go into the games.

For the first time in what felt like forever I smile at him. It was a small smile still heavy with sadness but for once I felt a little happy. "I'll go." I said and Vincent nodded with an approving smile.

"Good. Now where's that shadow of yours cause you'll need to get going if you're going to make it in time for dinner. Yes, I know it's still early but after seeing you walk around this house you're going to need some extra time to get there. And no, I'm not coming because I already have my own dinner already made and I am too sleepy to do anything else." Vincent said, already answering the questions I was going to ask him. He then kissed me on my forehead and patted my shoulder. "You take care. Gabriel, where are you? Azaria needs to leave."

As if on cue Gabriel came through the door just in time. "Leave? Leave where?" He asked.

"Azaria decided to accept the Carlton's offer for dinner. Make sure she gets there, I'm heading home." With that Vincent said goodbye to both of us and went out the door.

"You sure you're up for the walk there? It's kind of far and you just got better." Gabriel said as he stands in front of me and offers his hand. Nodding my head I take the offered hand to help me stand and walk towards the door. Next to the front door there's a coat and hat stand with a black jacket already hanging there for me. Taking it and putting it on I walk out into the cool breeze accompanied by Gabriel. The way to town from the victor's village was unknown to me so I let Gabriel walk in front to lead the way but when he finally realized that I was behind him he slowed down for me until I caught up with him. "Wouldn't want you falling behind." He said. "I don't suppose you might be in a talking mood?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Why haven't you gone home?" I asked as I stared at the ground, not wanting to look at him because I didn't want to imagine Jaran's face. "I saw your things in the room next to mine." Gabriel gave an awkward laugh, accepting that he had been caught.

"Because I wanted to make sure you were okay. You have nightmares about Jaran a lot, don't you." He said. Hesitantly I nod my head. I wanted to deny it, show that I'm fine, but from his tone it's obvious that I'm not. Every night since. "You're not like some other people when they have nightmares. You don't thrash in your sleep or cry out. Instead you curl up into a tight ball and whimper for Jaran." He sounded like he wanted to say something more but he didn't continue. We walked on in companionable silence, for me it was but I didn't really know about Gabriel cause he was kind of a bit fidgety, until we finally made it to the Carlton's home. When they saw us coming I could tell they were really excited that I came but they tried to hide it so as to not overwhelm me, especially when they also saw how tired I was. Despite their enthusiastic attitude all I could really manage were small half smiles that still never really reached my eyes.

Even though it wasn't much the dinner was good and was kept lively by they whole family. I didn't know if this is how they always have their meals together or if they're just doing it to try and make me comfortable around them. Either way, I was happy that I came and was content enough to listen to the conversations. Sometimes Ariana would catch my attention and would just talk to me. As I watch everyone talk with each I wonder to myself if this could've been what our family would've been like if our parents didn't die and Jaran wasn't called in the reaping. Would we have been this happy? Together until our parents showed signs of old age with me and Jaran grown and strong because we had one another? Would mom and dad look like Mr. and Mrs. Carlton, holding hands and laughing with us? And if Jaran had been allowed to live, would he look as strong and happy as Gabriel does now?

Knowing full well that I was letting myself think these things that would make me feel sad all over again I quickly excused myself, telling everyone that I was going to be back, and left. Once I had passed through the front door I had just managed to move off to the side, before my legs bend under my sadness, to lean against the wall of the house. Curling up into a ball I bury my face into my arms, the sleeves of my jacket absorbing my tears instantly. This time the ache in my chest was not only for Jaran but for the loss of my parents once again. But I had to stop it, I had to calm down enough so that I could go back in and not have everyone worry about me, but it was so hard. Once I started crying it was difficult to stop. Even when I felt someone sit down next to me and wrap their arms around me. In an instant I already knew it was Gabriel. After being around him for the past weeks or so I already know by now that Gabriel would always be near, like how I was with Jaran.

After crying myself tired, like I always seem to keep doing, I finally uncurl from my cramped position and turned to look at Gabriel next to me. "I want to go home." I said, my voice rasping pitifully. With a nod he brought us both onto our feet and offered me his back. Originally I would have refused but I got on without a second thought, wrapping my arms around his neck to help keep me up.

"Mrs. Carlton, thank you for the dinner. It was really good. We'll just take our leave now." Gabriel said at the doorway, announcing to the family that we were going.

"We're sorry if we said anything that made Azaria cry again." I heard Ariana say. Feeling a little sheepish I hide my face on the back of Gabriel's neck and felt him shake his head.

"It's okay. She's just a little tired is all. Good night." With that he turns and starts walking back to the victor's village. The whole way back I kept my head down and rambled on about things, mostly about Jaran. I, of course, haven't talked about him enough so all of a sudden I just felt like doing so.

"While we were walking earlier today, no matter how many times I didn't want to, I kept looking around at some of the familiar places that me and Jaran used to go to. And every time I did it would take almost everything I had just to not break down in front of you." I turned to the side so that my head was resting on Gabriel's shoulder and I was staring at the places we were passing by. "That store over there was when Jaran wanted one of those carved figures that the carpenter would sometimes make. We were at a distance so I was safely able to make some kind of remark about the carpenter's work and how our dad is much better. Anxious to find out if I was right we raced back home and he asked dad if he could make him a carving of a dog chasing its tail like the one he saw at the store. I told Jaran that dad could do better than that and asked dad to make Jaran his favorite bird, since it was one of the things that the carpenter didn't make. Jaran was so happy when it was finished he started learning from our dad and stopped asking for toys when he can make them himself." All of a sudden I started laughing. "Of course since he wasn't that good yet the carvings were just vague shapes of what Jaran wanted. He made so many that we had a little army of disfigured animal carvings. Luckily Jaran was understanding enough that they weren't very good so we used them for firewood." When we had already passed the little store and started going down the lonely stretch of road towards the victor's village I turned down my face so that the tears that were coming again would get absorbed in Gabriel's jacket. "Even after our parents died he still continued to get better, saying that one day he'll be just as good as dad was. That swallow carving that he gave to Caesar was actually better than how dad made them. And now it's the only thing that I have that reminds me of Jaran. But it shouldn't be that way. I should've protected him better. If I did he wouldn't be dead. He would've been taken in by the Carltons and would've had a family again. It's not that I don't like the Carltons but Ariana reminds me too much of Jaran. Not only her, but you too." Even as my unexpected anger started to rise in the back of my mind I noted that Gabriel was surprised by what I had said and turned his head slightly as if to look back at me. "What made Jaran think of the idea of having me live instead of him. He knows that I've done everything for him and now what is all that worth? Nothing. Because now he's gone and I'm left here rambling like an idiot and not knowing what to do."

"Azaria." Gabriel said somewhat tentatively.

"What?" I growled out, kind of surprising myself with how I reacted.

"I didn't really want to say this to you because I know that you need to let out some things but, it's kind of hard to keep you on my back when you're thrashing around and hitting my back." Feeling myself calm down I look down at my clenched fist where I had smashed it down on the back of his shoulder. I didn't notice that I was even hitting him.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"No, it's fine. It's just that I just almost let you go." Gabriel said, cutting me off when I was trying to apologize to him. Thinking that I've said and done enough I go back into the same position that I was in before and stay silent the rest of the way. When we had reached my home I tried to get off but Gabriel held on to me until I was in my room and he could put me down on my bed. I was so tired that I immediately stretched myself out as Gabriel took off my jacket and my boots for me. Before he left to put them away he stopped to look down at the swallow carving that was still sitting on the small table next to my bed. "Jaran really is skilled." He took it and gave it to me. "He will always be remembered."

After that day I think I started to get a little better. Whenever the Carltons or Vincent came over, or even some of the other people in the District, I found myself smiling a little more. Gabriel, as always, would mostly stay in the house with me and would very few times go home to get something, sometimes even bringing his family along to come visit. The first time they did I told them how helpful Gabriel has been to me and thanked them for allowing him to stay with me. His older brother was just saying a teasing remark, something about not being surprised with his brother's actions, when Gabriel nudged him hard in the stomach. The two brothers looked so alike that, to me, they could've been twins with the dark hair, blue eyes, and the medium build that they got from their father and from doing a lot of wood work. Both their parents were really nice, like the Carltons, and their mom wished me a full recovery on my own time. For a second I didn't get what she meant by that, but she of course knew, along with everbody else and myself, that it was going to take a while for me to adjust to life without Jaran. And even if I do it still will be hard for me. Eventually, since my house was so big with a lot of extra rooms, I decided to have the Carltons and Gabriel's family live with me. Of course they were modest and wouldn't accept the offer at first but when they saw my expression and thought I might grow distant again they accepted and moved with in within a few days.

Every week I would be taken out of the house by either Gabriel, Vincent, or Ariana for some exercise and fresh air, especially after being severely weakened by Jaran's death. Sometimes it would be a few hours and sometimes we would be out for the whole day, but whenever we passed a crowd of people I would always look over at them halfheartedly as if expecting Jaran to come from behind them with a smile and tell me about something that he did or found. So for weeks and months it's like this until the time came for the victory tour when I saw Tobias and Aylin again. They were so happy to see me that they both could've tackled me to the ground with hugs if they hadn't seen the my still depress face, but I gave them a welcoming smile nonetheless.

Just like whenever I'm around most people I mostly stayed silent and listened to random conversation. Gabriel almost didn't come with me, despite him begging, but when Vincent told them that he's the only one that could keep me calm, because I was still in mourning and I have random mood swings, he was allowed to get on the train with us, along with some funny looks that we're exchanged between my escort and stylist. Because I wasn't focusing enough to do what I needed to do Vincent and Gabriel helped talked me through my speeches when we visited each District and helped me to keep up a decent appearance when we were in the Capitol for the dinner parties and interviews. When we got back to District 7 for the celebration dinner I slipped away to my old home which have been left untouched after I had set it on fire. As usual I wasn't alone for long because Gabriel found me with two plates of food. As we ate we talked about random things, mostly him talking and me listening. He told me about his family, silversmiths that make the axes, saws, and some of the materials that the workers us to chop down trees so they were one of the few families in the District that were well off enough. He even told me that while he was watching me in the Games that it was when he first started to really care for me and every time he saw me crying he just wanted to hold me and make me feel better. For some reason I didn't feel as surprised as I think I should have felt. I guess in a way I kind of already knew how he felt about me, I was just too preoccupied thinking and, I guess, hullucinating about Jaran to really get it until Gabriel pretty much confessed to me.

After that we started to grow a little more closer. I started to openly rely on Gabriel that sometimes I felt like I was Jaran, in a way, when I was there for him when our parents died. One time when I felt too restless to sleep I silently got out of my room and went down to sleep on one of the couches. The feel of something pressing against my back was comforting because that's how I used to keep watch over Jaran while we slept. With our backs to each other. As always I wouldn't expect Gabriel to come and then wouldn't be surprised if he appeared all of a sudden. He obvioiusly didn't like the idea of me sleeping on the couch and offered, after I had explained to him why I wanted to be on the couch, to sleep back to back with me if I returned to my room. At first I was hesitant to accept, obviously because I had never slept next to anyone other than Jaran, but I was tired and really wanted to sleep. Besides after having spent so much time with him I've learned that when it concerns me there's no stopping Gabriel.

After a while I started feeling restless, but at the same time I started talking less and worrying the people around me. Again. I thought I was doing fine but lately, for some reason, I started to feel like how I felt before. I don't know what made me start thinking sadly about Jaran again and then getting back to my mood swings. Like before everyone tried being gentle with me when they saw how I was acting and that would sometimes make me angry when it shouldn't have even made me frustrated. I would try to be alone, walking around town or trying to go to the forest, to the places where I used to go with Jaran, but I was never left alone. No matter what happened over the past months when I thought I would feel better, no matter what anyone did or say, no matter what I thought or would do I know I would never get over Jaran's death and I would never be the same. Even if I wanted to. Eventually, as I had been expecting for a long time, even Gabriel got tired of all the depressing things I kept doing, and I guess it was also combined with something I had said. It was our first argument where he talked back to me but he still withheld some of his anger. He was trying to make me see that I'm only hurting myself by regressing into my depression all over again and that it wasn't healthy for me. Even now he was still trying to be patient and understanding and it kind of frustrated me, especially when it should be him being all moody instead of me. Everyone else was trying to calm us both down but at the same time didn't really know what to do.

"I know Jaran would've wanted you to move on. How do you think he would feel if he saw you like this?" Everything else that he said I didn't really care about cause I've already accepted it, but just the fact that he brought the possibility of Jaran's feelings into it stopped me short. I already know that Jaran would not want me to feel sad in any way over his death, but I didn't know why Gabriel's question affected me so much. Before I knew it I was out the door and into the cool evening air, my adoptive mothers tried to pull me back but I managed to slip away from everyone. Behind me, the voices getting lower and lower the farther I went, I could hear that Gabriel had tried to go after me but was held back by Vincent. Telling him to let me be for a while and that I would come back on my own. Anything else that was said was lost to me as I entered the forest.

As I ran through the trees I was vaguely reminded of the time when I was running with Jaran and Aster during the Games last year. Back then he was still strong and alive and I was so determined to keep him safe when all along he knew that my effort was wasted with his own plans. Because I still haven't really fully recovered from all the sadness and depression that has followed me since Jaran died I had to come to a sudden stop. Holding onto a tree for support and breathing hard I rest there for a while and started moving again. The sun is only a few minutes from setting, but it gave enough light for me to see where I was going, and even when it turned dark I had gone through the forest many times with Jaran that I already knew my way around. At least enough to get back to my old home. I never really knew the reason why but I was told by Vincent that the people of District 7 had argued with the Peacekeepers, and I think maybe a few Capitol representatives, to keep my burnt-to-the-ground home the way it was. I guess it was out of respect for me and I was grateful that they had left it alone.

Following a path that was made by me and Jaran running through it many times I eventually arrive to the remains of the house I used to live in. Crunching through the burnt wood and scattered ashes memories start coming back to me, memories that used to be happy and thought of fondly that had been pushed away by pain and sadness. At the place that I'm standing was where our beds used to be. One for our parents and another one that I shared with Jaran. Just a few paces off to the side was where a window used to be. And when it was dark we liked to wait for the fireflies to appear and catch them in our palms, seeing how much we could get while staying behind the window. Turning around I see the small stool that was made for Jaran, tipped over and blackened, in the middle of everything. After months of holding it I cry once again for the first time in a while, but I don't feel as sad as I thought I might but. Oddly I feel fine. I just miss him and that is all.

Just as I finally decided to go back home to everyone it starts raining. It was kind of like when I came back from the Capitol. It started out small and then eventually became heavier. Looking back at the small stool I kiss the tips of my fingers, place them on the stool as if I was saying goodbye, and left for the trees. Because some of the branches were entertwined with each other they offered a little shelter from the rain, but it didn't stop me from getting wet. It has been a long time since I had played in the rain and the last time was with Jaran last year before he had gotten reaped for the Hunger Games. My run earlier had heated me up so the feel of the cool rain felt very nice as I walked in the muddy forest floor. Laughing a little to myself to relieve some of the tension that I was feeling earlier I picked up a handful of mud and pine needles and entertained myself with it until I reached the victor's village. By the looks of the house I must have been gone for a while because the whole house was dark and was nearly invisible in the dark with the rain if it wasn't for one small window that showed some light. Dropping the mudball and washing my hands off I make my way to the house, oddly feeling better than ever. As if I was relieved of something. When I had gone up the steps I raised my hand to knock on the door but then all of a sudden it flung open and I was attacked by a towel and yanked inside. Through the fluffing of the towel around me I could hear Gabriel saying a string of apologies.

"Azaria, I am really sorry, I didn't mean to say something like that to you and I shouldn't have in the first place. I got worried when it started raining and you hadn't come back, so I stayed up waiting for you and let everyone go to sleep-"

"Gabriel, if you don't want to suffocate me you can take the towel off now. I think I'm dry with all the rubbing you're doing." I said, sure that I just received a tangled mess of hair. "And stop apologizing so much." Taking the towel from Gabriel I wrap it around myself in an attempt to get a little warm. I didn't realize how cold I was until Gabriel started hugging me and I felt myself shivering. "I guess I'm going to get sick again."

"Not unless you get properly dried and warm. I'll get you something to drink." Gabriel said as he led me to the couch and draped a blanket over me. From his expression I could see that he's noticed the slight difference in me, that I wasn't all sulky and sad anymore. I still don't feel any different about Jaran, but I at least feel much better now. After a few hours of sitting and talking with Gabriel his mother, who was actually headed for the bathroom, told us to go to sleep already.

Despite me having finally accepted Jaran's passing I still couldn't shake the restless feeling that I had before I got depressed again. Many times I've attempted to figure out why I was feeling this way, but it was so habitual that I guess I was also feeling the same restlessness while mourning for Jaran and wanting something to relieve the feelings. Before the reaping all me and Jaran ever did was hunt, scavange, work, practice our skills, and live the way we know how. Now that he's gone and I'm in better living conditions, what is there for me to do? So one day I prepared a letter for everyone, packed together things I would need that would last for a while, including Jaran's swallow carving, and kept it all hidden until everyone in the house was fast asleep before I left. And that part wasn't easy, especially when the person sleeping next to you has a firm hold on you even in their sleep. I placed my note where it could easily be found and left after taking one last looking at my adoptive family.

In my note I explained how I just couldn't keep sitting around doing nothing. That I needed something for me to do that occupies almost all of my time, and that I couldn't stay and I would miss them. I knew everyone in both families well enough to know that they will try to find me and convince me to stay with them, especially Gabriel. He's always so protective of me that I wonder if Jaran ever felt annoyed with me when I acted like that to him. Taking my things I decided to live deep in the forest, farther than anyone else had been to cut down trees for the Capitol. And when I thought I was far enough I went just a little bit farther until I was satisfied to set up my new home. It had taken me a total of three days to reach the place where I wanted to be and was sure that no matter how long my adoptive families searched, they would never find me unless I wanted to be found. Which was true for about a month, of which, during that time, I had somehow managed to befriend a nearby wolf pack. Once again underestimating Gabriel he had spent most of the month that I was gone looking for me, and no matter how many times I tried to tell him that he should stay with his family he wouldn't leave. I constantly urged him to go home but he wouldn't, saying that he was already home. I probably would've kept at it if he hadn't suddenly kissed me and put my angel necklace back around my neck, so after that I finally accepted the fact that I was really glad he found me.

Some years later we've already built a sturdy and, well concealed, little tree house. The Capitol, eventually finding out that I had disappeared from District 7, had sent out those aircrafts to look for me. But after a while I guess they got tired and gave up the search, which I believed was pointless in the first place because the forest was a really big place to look for a single person. The wolf pack that I had befriended were like our pets in the backyard and sometimes me and Gabriel would go and play with them. There was one wolf among them though that reminded me of the one that protected me, Jaran, and Aster in the arena. Mostly just the way he would beg for food from us. And then there's the little boy that just loves to run around and keep us on our toes. Because Gabriel and Jaran's hairstyles look pretty similar he just looked like my little brother, so we named him Jaran. It was mainly Gabriel that named him because I couldn't think of anything else for a name and we both agreed anyway. He may not be Jaran, my brother, but he was Jaran, my - our - son. And this time he was not going to die before me.

Yeah, I'm so happy I've finally finished XD Hope you enjoyed reading. Please review and tell me what you think :3


	10. Fun Facts :3

Just for the fun of it I decided to make a Fun Facts chapter for my story. You know, reasons for why I did this and that and just for the sake of putting it up because the idea keeps on bugging me until I finally write it out. And of course you don't have to read it if you don't want to, or whatever your reason, but again, I just wanted to do it. So here they are!

Chapter 1

When I first decided to write the first chapter it was just one of those things you just got to do or you'll never get any peace of mind. My original plan was just to have it up for about a month or two and then take it down, but that changed after getting a wonderful review almost immediately so it encouraged me to continue what I started ::You know who you are so thank you XD ::

The idea of Azaria partly came from, obviously, Katniss volunteering for Prim in the games, partly from the idea if one was a brother and one was a sister, and partly from my own feelings if it was my own little brother. Azaria, of course, acts differently than I would have but the goal would mostly be the same or similar.

My District escort, the clown dog, was inpired from Tigris. Especially the moving tail. But I didn't go all out with the facial features and stuff

Chapter 2

Most everyone, except Azaria, Jaran, and Ariana, was named specifically so that their names kind of matched them in a way. With the meaning of Azaria's name, however, I found out what it meant and it helped me to think of a token for her and Jaran. A girl, thought of at first as an angel, enveloped by wings. At the same time the token gave me an idea for the ending too so that her token symbolized her in a few different ways.

Gabriel Oscar was of course thought of and named because of the angel token since his role in the end was to be Azaria's comforter when Jaran died. Since the majority of my story was just thought of on the spot and not planned at all I had originally made up Gabriel, under a different name, to be just a random side character that you would never really see again. Until I thought of the token

The clown dog District escort was actually named by a friend of mine who I asked what would be a good name for my weird charater, and Cadogan... I forgot how I got that name for him. Throughout the story his personality was mostly based on dramatic characters from other animes I've watched.

As for my mentor character both names Vincent and Randi, from what I looked up, both have a meaning relating to a wolf. Reason being is that I love wolves and I just had to put in at least something about them in almost every story I do. I wanted him to be more like a real mentor so I had him talk as if answering almost any possible questions that you could ask abou the situation, but I also want him to have some kind of issue. Just like how Haymitch likes to drink, Vincent likes to sleep and never really fix his hair.

Chapter 3

For Azaria's stylist, Aylin Kayl, both names came from two different, I believe, uknown stylists. Her design... seriously made up on the spot while Rune was based off of another mouse character of mine from a different story. Just different personalities.

Same goes for the costume designs for Azaria and Jaran at the Tribute parade at the opening ceremonies. Just made it up nearly on the spot but had to work out some things here and there.

Chapter 4

For some reson, even I don't know why, I decided to make Mikeg and Tobias brothers cause I though it would be a short fun idea.

Just as I was ending the chapter I first got the idea that this should probably be where Jaran first asks Vincent to help him know what he could do to make sure that Azaria makes it as the victor. The idea was of course inspired from the second book of the hunger game how both Katniss and Peeta want to keep each other alive while trying to hide their intent from the other, except, with my characters one of them dies.

Chapter 5

Because I was wondering what I was going to have Azaria and Jaran do in the arena I thought about having them to team up with someone. So I suddenly made Aster on the spot, but just so I could have more to work with and to put some mystery, or maybe it was obvious, I don't know, I made her a traitor. But she was an unwilling traitor at least. Design was kind of based off of a funny comment about droopy-eared rabbits and thought that would be a cute comparison for her.

Chapter 6

I kind of had a hard time thinking up a different kind of arena, but once I reread the part where Katniss was explaining how the arena had different terrains I then thought of an arena that's nearly freezing cold both night and day and contained forests of different kinds. Hence the forest of forests with small steams running through it to mark the boundaries of each forest area.

I of course had to look up different kinds of trees until I figured I didn't even have to name all of them since Azaria's group wasn't even going to move around that much. But what I had listed was birch, junipers, hickory, sequoia, narra, bamboo, oak, cedar, elm.

Chapter 7

Because, as I said earlier, I love wolves so I just had to have an actual wolf in the arena. But since I had already introduced altered animals I wanted to also put in the idea that the arena has a mixture of altered and naturals. Plus I wanted a way to finish off the fourth Career Tribute.

Chapter 8

Not really meaning to do the same thing with Katniss and Rue when she dies I also wanted a little sing-til-dead scene, but instead it's more personal between the two siblings. Though making the lyrics for the instrumental song plus writing the whole chapter, everything just made my cry.

I got the idea of the goodbye video recording that Jaran did for Azaria to see from the Inheritance series. When Brom made a kind of message for Eragon through Saphira's memory if he dies before telling Eragon what he needed to know. Plus I also thought it would add nicely to Jaran's planning behind Azaria's back.

Chapter 9

This whole chapter was kind of hard for me to write because I have not had any experience with mourning whether it be myself or someone I know. So most of the things that Azaria thought, did, and felt was from imagination and ideas from books I've read. But I guess I did okay.

Since I made Gabriel as the main person that helps Azaria through her grief I thought to make his situation to be both a way to make up for his guilt with his own little brother and have the roles switched with Azaria.

The idea of Azaria running away into the forest came from, if also not obvious, Gale. And because I liked the idea of Gabriel following her I had her leave by herself, wanting to be alone.

As for the two families that lived with Azaria in her big house, I didn't put it in the chapter cause I didn't think of it at the time, Azaria and Gabriel would visit them every now and then. And whenever someone, or the people from the Capitol, asks where is Azaria and Gabriel the two families could just say they love spending time in the forest. Lame probably but that's what I just came up with.

General facts:

This is a general question asked from someone but as I wrote the last two chapters it was emotional for me, in a way. I don't usually cry, not because I don't care but just that I don't cry easily, typing out Jaran's death, mostly, made me tear up. As I said earlier part of Azaria's personality overall is kind of how I would think about my own little brother. Though I would be careful not to let him read this story cause... well I don't know how he's really going to react but it would just be embarrasing for me.

I didn't notice this because it was unintentional but it was pointed out to me that not only was the angel necklace token a kind of symbolism of Azaria's life but also the wolves I put in. I just thought that it was kind of cool how it was noticed like that.


End file.
